Just trying to be Raw!
Uhmm i just want myself to be unfilter/Real day by day it is becoming hard for me to live with a adaptable behaviour i adapt people's vibe, energy and try to give them what makes them happy i spent my so much energy on making me people feel special, valued, cared but it is just getting hard for me to keep up with this when you don't receive those things it's not that people don't try to put same efforts but most of the time they just fail to understand me and give me the support i want that is why I just started shutting off my emotions now i can't express even being vulnerable feel like a chore, responsibility or burden.
I was thinking suppressing it is not gonna be helpful and will make mental health worst but talking with family, friend is not a option anymore they can't understand my situation maybe bcz they are immature they don't react carefully and also in the way i want. Talking to listener?not a good idea for me I feel I have to put a act now matter with whom I'm talking there's just something inside me that make me feel I have to please everybody I'm afraid of hurting someone even 1% by my actions human interaction just seems not an option for me currently.
I'm trying other way and posting thread is one of them Thankyou for giving me your precious time by reading this ♥️
Hi @justpari9.
It sounds like you are having difficulties.
Of course, post in the forums if this is more comfortable for you.
Thank you so much for being part of our family, I hope you find peace and solace or whatever you are searching for..
Thank you for sharing this..🌟
Hey,
I appreciate you as well for being part of this community and thankyou for activitly listening to people i really appreciate your presence ♥️
Hugs🤗
@justpari9 Hey 💙 I'm sorry you're dealing with that
It sucks that even with a listener, you end up feeling like you're wearing a mask 💙 I hope this method works out
Also, I guess something to keep in mind is that maybe starting a chat with the intention of chipping away at that mask might work? My door's always open if you'd like to try 💙 may take a while but I'd love to get to meet the real you
I hope things get easier from here on out 💙
Hey, @raphael86 thanks for your concerns 💗
I'll surely try the method you suggested i appreciate your support and advice.🤗♥️
@justpari9
welcome, this is very thoughtful of you. Thank you for taking care of yourself and being considerate of your own situation. For givers like yourself it is not a small thing.
Hey, @pinkCherry1616
I'm genuinely greatful for your kind word it really made me feel appreciated.
Thanks for being so supportive and kind sending you lots of loveeee...💖🤗
@justpari9 😊
Sending lots of love too 💕
I relate all too well And I have the same nature as yours.
Here is what I think I know about people: 90% of them, If you treat them better, They treat you worse. If you work harder to be a great Person to them, and anticipate their needs, they Misinterpret your Love and generosity, And then they feel like they are better than you because you must be desperate to treat them so good, And They feel like they are so valuable that there’s no way they could lose you.
10% of people, If you treat them better, They treat you better, And there is a very positive Energy loop that way.
So there have been times where I have realized I was emotionally tied To some people in the 90%. And I kept treating them better, Then they kept taking me for granted more. So I never became mean or cold, but I just Stopped proactively Putting energy into the 90%. I started valuing The 10% so much and putting time and energy into those relationships, which grew And make life Really good. And the weird part is, About half of the 90% now Works a lot hard To try to get me back. But I know their nature is That if I treat them better, they still will treat me worse, So I just I don’t put much energy into them at all.
The 10% is out there for sure, I am one of them , but you have to clear out space and time for them In your life, Stop wasting time on the 90% so that you have Energy & time when you meet a 10% person! You are that top 10%, And life is going to get alot better!!
Hey,@Redwell
In my case I keep realtionship with very less people in my life and 90% people that you are talking about I've never let them get close to me for the 10% those people are the one that I've now because they atleast try there best and put efforts whenever I ask them but still aren't so mature enough and emotionally supportive.
Once i thought of making other friends that can be emotionally supportive and i did but again the same situation they weren't really mature enough but atleast people I have currently in my life they try to do there best and are really good then many people I've dealt in past even though that doesn't feel enough but still it's valuable in some way
Anyways thank-you that you took the time to reply me and I'm very grateful for your insights and advice 🤗♥️
@justpari9
I can relate to this SO much. "I'm afraid of hurting someone" I literally thought the exact same phrase a few months ago. Shutting down your emotions? I've did the same about three or four years ago and now I'm tring to return to feel things again because you are right, it is not healthy for human's mind and in my case I even feel bad because I've drowned my feelings so deeply that I've stopped caring about people, I became passive-aggressive and started hurting people being mean to them, rage became my guide, hate became my food and water and revenge became my only goal. I've passed from not feeling anything to feeling only hate. Then somehow I've started desiring the possibility to put down what became my shield for the world and to feel positive emotions like happiness, satisfaction or love again. And after all of this, I'm still tring to understand who the *** am I. So if you want an advice from me, don't suppress your feelings, don't make the same mistake I did, one day things will get better, never stop hope for that day and be always ready for it. You'll surely suffer for the way to reach happiness, but as I use to say, pain is necessary for growth or relief, you don't get stronger in a comfortable home. But nothing is eternal, one day it will end, never stop hoping. I wish you the best
Also, being more real doesn't mean adapt to others. You just have to follow your instincts and stop worring about what people say about you or about what you SHOULD do, just don't think, be yourself, follow the famous slogan "Just do it!" You can also write in your diary how you acted during the day and then reflect about what comes out, I think it can be useful in some cases
Hey,@powerfulEyes4127
I'm glad to know that i wasn't the only one feeling such things and knowing that u are not alone gives me alot of hope thanks for sharing your experience
I'll surely try journaling even I've did before but I was wondering is it really right way to deal and now i know yes it is
Thanks for putting efforts and your insights here appreciated alot...lots of love and best of luck to you too💗
