Nostalgic

Just when I feel like I'm emerging

from the deep dark abyss of *** that is my mind,

just as fast, I am pulled back in again.

The formless shadows dwelling in my head

pull me  in with their long maniacal claws rasping words of hatred and lies...

and in they take me drag me deeper and deeper

into a mudpit of sorrow and pain

till I cannot see a single glimmer of light anymore ...where even starlight drowns

Swimming in this pitch-black pit,

I struggle to find my way out,

gagging and choking,

trying to catch a breath.

All I want is to be out there,

where the birds sing in harmony with the winds

and the trees hum along in joyous embrace with their branches reaching out like open arms...

I long to be one with nature, singing along,

the rhythm of my heart matching the rumble

of the flowing river, my heart a drum to the rivers flow.