I feel like I'm not living... I want happiness again
Hello everyone!
I'm here cause I feel like there's no hope for me. I don't have a clue what I want to do in my life, how I can contribute to this society. I studied something I later realised I don't like and now I feel stuck in that meaningless industry. I don't have any real passion, not something I love more than anything. My relationship with someone who I think is my only soulmate on this planet has ended. He was the only person that made me come alive so much, I never feel as happy around anyone else, we have a very deep connection and although we remain friends it's hard not to have him in my life more cause that always gave me strength to be who I want to be and now I don't feel like I can do it on my own. I'm not very close with my parents to tell them all of this, I feel scared, it's probably my conditioning and always wanting to look like I'm doing fine...but I'm really not! I feel so depressed and unworthy of anything, nothing makes me happy and I feel like there is nothing to live for now that I'm not with him. And talking to him and hearing that he is sorting out his life in the way I always thought we could do together makes me so envious and more depressed. There are things that I want to do, I have some dreams of travelling or having a job where I can connect with people and help them in some way but there's always the money issue. And my fear of failure. I am too scared to try things that my heart is yearning for. I don't know how to overcome any of this. Can anyone relate? Help?
@FeelingLostAF
Hello friend, I completely understand what you going through, we are all here to help you come better in life, all you have to do is never lose hope and things will automatically fall in it's places, If you ever want to talk to someone reach for me,I'm here to help you :)
You got us!
Stay strong! :)
There's always a SOLUTION.
First off, I suggest following your growth path on 7Cups, even if it doesn't help at all, you would've invested no money into it and all it takes is at least 5 min a day, if not less. I also suggest finding a listener that suits you; there are some compassionate listeners out there who will actively listen to you, give some advice and make you feel a bit better. Freely use the resources that are available here.
Now a little ranting: I feel like I can relate to this a bit. I think you should do what you want to do as a hobby or find some more information about it or find something that you might like (like listening to music); even though it definitely can't fix flaws on its own, it can make you feel good and that's already a step towards getting better. Now I think that you shouldn't chase happiness necessarily; you should realize that we can't always be happy, and that there will eventually be times when we feel sad, stressed, angry or whatever negative emotion we feel. But I think that once you find hope, you should hold onto it, even when you might feel there is no hope, you should have something or someone to regain or remind you of the hope that you have, even if it's talking to someone on this site.
These kinds of emotions will help you gain more experience about this sort of stuff and they will therefore make you stronger and more compassionate, just like I now know and am learning how to deal with my flaws and like I have an idea right now about what you're going through. But try not to cope with it alone if you can, having people help you cope with it makes it easier to overcome the obstacles because they can bring you up when you feel down. At the very least, you can talk to people on this site, who are here to talk to you about these kinds of problems.
I encourage you to be active in resolving your issues, e.g. I like to write at least 3 things that I can do for that day: it can range from small things like doing a task on this site to working out, reading a book, discovering films or music, doing a few lessons at Coursera, doing something that develops your skills and hobbies or maybe even something job-related. You don't have to do any of them, but it would be better than doing nothing all day. You don't have to do this stuff, you can instead do something else, but I'm just giving some advice on how to help you do better.
Anyway, I hope you get better and I'm glad you're here and that you want to make a step towards resolving your problems.
I might've digressed a bit too far with this post. Well, it doesn't matter, I hope you do better in the future.
I'm probably older than you are, but I remember feeling very much the same way in my teenage and young adult years. I did not have a good support system in my family of origin, so I put so much into every relationship I had. When I was with someone, I think I put everything into that person, not even to other friends. So, whenever I experienced a relationship breakup, it felt like I was losing my entire world. Which, in a way, recreated an old trauma of mine.
I remember thinking, "I will never able to find anyone like her again." I ruminated for month, years. My mind is highly obsessive by nature and that didn't help matters. Those thoughts made me feel hopelessly depressed. There was a sense that whatever I had in that relationship could never ever be recreated.
As for not knowing what your passion is, what I've learned is that some people can't identify anything that they feel passionately about - and that is okay. I'm not that way, myself. I have a passion for creative arts and if I don't somehow get to work on something create, I feel like a part of me is dead or dying.
I don't know if you have any funds to get into therapy, but that was immensely helpful to me back then. In some cities, there are behavioral health services that are free for people who don't have the funds. Or there are sliding scale clinics.
Anyway, I hope that some of this is helpful. Hang in there.