One word to describe how I feel today is....
One word to describe how I feel today is....
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Convoluted
Disappointed
Buttload. Disappointed.
...I can do it (cooking). Will be more strategic next time and prepare...maybe I need more disappointments before drastically changing.
A mix of meh and down
Tomorrow is my birthday, 1st one in my new home, 1st one since my move, 2nd one without my mom and stepdad. And 2nd one without cake.
No plans as they typically fall through and I am semi isolated where I am from my friends and I have no friends here yet. Can't get a pet sitter last minute so can't go to the amusement parks or anywhere for more than 1 night.
and even before the move, I rarely got to spend the day with friends even virtually.
and I have a rule that I don't celebrate the day much, particularly given the painful birthday "gift" I received 8 years ago. That alone always makes the day lame.
So will be just another typical day, glad my cats are present as spending the day completely alone would suck.
"tiredbutexcited"
Ashamed
I don't put much stock in my birthday each year anymore due to a belated birthday 'gift' I received exactly 8 years ago today.
Gift unfortunately would not be an accurate term; brutal bell ringing, penalty, perma-ban, punishment would be more accurate.
Can't be angry at the giver of the gift as there is no reason to be, but plenty of reasons to be angry at myself for causing myself to deserve receiving it.
and i'm forbidden from making amends for the screwups that eventually resulted in this 'gift' as thanks to the autistic double standard that unfortunately exists, they forever see me as a bad person.
Clarification for the above: I'm autistic
Agitated
sight
Happy
Exhausted
