Depression in the Christmas Season
Hiya Lovelies!!
As Christmas is fast approaching, I've noticed that my depression has got worse. Christmas is a time to be jolly, give presents and eat a lot of food. Yet, I just don't feel that normal fuzzy feeling like I used to.
I've been finding simple classes which I used to like, harder. The teachers play Christmas music in the background and it just reminds me of when my best friend moved house last year, it was a pretty sad time. At that point in my life, Christmas was just blocked out. I feel like I'm already trying to push the duties of Christmas away. Buying gifts, eating lots of chocolate, putting up decorations.. All of which are just seeming like a chore to me.
Do you get what I mean? How does Christmas affect your depression? 
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@blossombreathe I think a lot of people can appreciate what you wrote and its not a happy time for a lot of people for many different reasons, some being they have no family, or they are under extreme financial pressures, spending time with family members who may be difficult to get along with, people who are homeless or barely able to feed themselves, people living in temporary accommodation, increase in domestic violence, people with eating disorders finding the whole issue of food at xmas difficult to cope with, or they may have had bereavements at this time of year etc....I could say so much...and depression is very much a feature for a lot of people.
Xmas has become so commercialised with the expectations to buy lots of gifts, spend a fortune on xmas decorations, food, drink etc. It is easy to get swept along with this all but deep inside a lot of people dread the xmas period, and cant wait until its over. I always go to the beach on xmas eve and let off a lot of balloons with messages inside, remembering all those who wont be having such a good xmas....somehow that makes it easier for me to be part of xmas with close friends whilst also thinking of those less fortunate, or who are on their own, or who have passed away, or who are missing.
Its a very difficult and stressful time
@dancingRainbow45
Yes, I think that Christmas can put a lot of stress on people and not everybody realises. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this. It's so nice to let off balloons on Christmas Eve to remember those who aren't here or are having a tough time around Christmas time. That is a lovely idea. 
Christmas definitely sweeps up people and puts them in stressed-out mood and it isn't very nice!! I am really struggling with depression and Christmas, it's affecting me more than I thought it would. Also the fact that a new year is approaching gives me more anxiety. 
@dancingRainbow45 This is how low I've gotten, all I can think about is the damage that those balloons do once they fall into the ocean. Instead of doing some ceremonial thing that means nothing in reality, why don't you actually go help the people instead of putting your sympathy for them in latex and letting it fly away just so you can feel better?
This is how low I've gotten, I can't just be blissful and forget about things.
@Phthalo
Awh Hun. I can see how you feel. Depression really sucks.
Try to be strong though. we can get through this together! How's your day gone so far?
*huggles*
@Phthalo
@Phthalo Im sorry you feel the way you do and perceive my ways of remembering people as meaningless. Everyone is intitled to their own views as you are.
I know what reasons and meanings lie behind my actions, what my true intentions are and whether people like the way I do things or not, I know that the reasons I do things, my actions, my feelings and thoughts are certainly not meaningless to me. Perhaps my way of doing things doesnt work or you or for other people but I remember people that matter to me in ways that have meaning and are symbolic for me and because ultimately those people matter to me, some of whom I cant help because they no longer walk this earth but that does not stop me putting time aside to do something special in their memory, to let them know they are not forgotton even at times like xmas when so many people are absorbed by present buying etc
And no matter how many people you try and help, there will always be others without that support and who have no one. We all have our own ways of doing things. Everyone has their own way of remembering but I wouldnt wish to diminish the importance or meaning behind how someone may choose to remember others.
@blossombreathe christmas can be sad mkay, you can have so much happiness and jolliness around you that it just makes the sadness sadder especially if you cant join in and feel left out </3 but we can always try out best to fight is and look past stuff and try to be as happy as possible :D <3
@Keanan
Yup! Christmas can bring everybody down but it's best to just look to the future and try to deal with it as best as you can. 
YESSSSSSS I get it. I've had to finally admit to myself that I just don't feel it this year. And it's the culmination of "not really feeling it" more and more over the years. I hate that it's come to this but... Idk. I know that feelings can't be forced, and feeling excited and joyful and christmassy can't be forced either. I can disguise it pretty well I guess, and I mean I'm not opposed to the food aspect (or making fun of cheesey hallmark movies) but other than that...I'm just not feeling it. I'm just kinda numb to it. Maybe I'll be ready for Christmas in March. (That has happened before). Idk there was my rambling.
@Phthalo
I see, feeling numb isn't a nice feeling but at least it hides what we really feel. Wearing a mask to try and seem happy may work in the short term but it's important for you still to get your emotions out in someway. I would suggest talking it out with a listener or writing everything down.
I believe in you, you are strong! *huggle*
I can't get over the fact that my puppy is in heaven, not comforting me and celebrating Christmas with me.
Also, my brother is locked up in jail so I can't hang out with him... even to just go ice skating or get food!
@alexaners7734
Awh I'm so sorry to hear that. There are still things out there that make you happy, right? Please try to stay strong during Christmas, you can do this.
@blossombreathe nope.
@blossombreathe
*Virtual Hugs if ok*
@Bluewolf1229
*huggle*
Good topic. I have mixed feelings about it.
Sometimes Christmas can bring back some of the magic and innocence of childhood. This was especially so when my kids were really small and I could enjoy the holiday through their eyes, creating new traditions and memories for them. Pulling them in the wagon around the neighborhood to see all the colorful lights. Trimming the tree while big snowflakes fall outside and cups of hot chocolate steam on the table. Two heads slowly falling asleep on my chest as Christmas songs play on the TV.
Sometimes, colors seem brighter, melodies lighter, foods sweeter.
Other times, it feels like there's this impossible pressure for the holidays to always be like that. But life doesn't just pause and allow you to drink it all in. The treadmill doesn't slow down. Work is still demanding and family stress doesn't give you a break.
What's more, holidays can be a kick in the gut. For me, I'm depressed, most of my family has moved away, I'm getting divorced, and I have no friends. Yet, when out and about or among acquaintances, you can't help but see all of these people who seem to be doing it all 'right' and can't help but reflect, 'What did I do wrong? Where did I go wrong? Why not me?' Last Christmas, when my wife and kids left to see family, I just sat there staring at the twinkling lights of the tree in dark contemplation, having nothing better to do, and I suppose I will do that again.
But even that, in some fundamental way, I feel is important. So I guess I'm sort of glad the holiday provides a break for some of that, to step off the treadmill for a moment, even into the darkness.
@BurkeDevlin
I see what you mean, Devlin. Christmas can bring back childhood memories and make you feel happier however with all the chaos going around you; it can make you feel lost. My depression certainly does get worse during the Christmas season and sometimes I just wish I could be happy again. It isn't that easy.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on depression regarding Christmas time. Wishing you the best,
Blossom xx
@blossombreathe I'm sorry you're feeling depressed around this time. It sure isn't that easy, you're right. I try (not always successfully) to ignore the aspects of Christmas that make me uncomfortable (commercialism, pressure to conform, tendency to idealize what Christmas should be). I do my best to keep a positive spirit about it, and to be honest, it helps that I am off work that week! I know that's maybe a cynical reason to look forward to Christmas, but I haven't had a proper day off since August, so I really need the time to recharge my batteries.
One way or another, it will be over soon. I wish you all the best as well!
@BurkeDevlin
*huggles*
@blossombreathe Christmas has been bitter sweet. I lost my dad to cancer a few years ago so it's never been the same, but it also makes me think of the good times I spent with him on the holiday.
@Mellietronx
I'm so sorry to hear that your Dad passed away a few years ago. This time of year must be pretty hard for you. However, thinking of the good times is what makes everything better. *huggles*
I hope you have a lovely day,
Blossom xx
@blossombreathe Thank you for your message :)
@Mellietronx
@Mellietronx
I am in the same boat. Lost my dad. Christmas was never the same...I also don't feel happy because every year that finishs just remindes me that I am not where I would like to be in life.
@blossombreathe
Awwwe hugsss! I'm sorry to hear this happens to you!! 
Stay strong though, you are not alone. Thank you so much for creating this thread and allowing others to share their thoughts and feelings!! You're the best! 
Message me if you need anything!
@PassionatePeyton
*huggle* Thank you for letting us know you're here for us, Christmas can really get me down sometimes.
I hope you have a lovely day! 
Blossom xx
I don't feel particularly more depressed during Christmas than other times of the year, but I also don't really feel much of anything at all during this time of year anymore. It used to be such an exciting and happy time for me, but the last few years it feels like I've just been going through each day just to get to the end of it. I mean, I only just realized today that Christmas is in a little over 2 weeks, whereas a few years ago I would start counting down the days until Christmas on November 1. It's definitely not an exciting time for me.
@quietDime4559
Yes, I can empathise with what you're saying Dime. You get used to this time of the year and sort of feel emotionless about it until it's the new year and everything is over.
*huggles* Thank you for sharing, wishing you all the best
Blossom xx
@quietDime4559 I understand. It Actually surprises me how much the things that used to bring me so much joy just don't anymore... but it's ok. Talking about it. accepting that there are periods of sadness, even if they seem to last years, they're stages. And you're not alone.
