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Feeling hopeless about my future, while dealing with what I think is depression

User Profile: unknowfuture712
unknowfuture712 November 10th, 2022

I got rejected from every job because I can't talk well. The worst is my last job, at first they told me my only job is to sit there and input the data, no need to communicate with the customers (which I thought was perfect for someone like me), but only after 2 days they told me I was too quiet. I still talked to the co-workers just fine, at least that was what I thought. My mouth work slower than my brain, so when words finally get to my mouth they might already left, but if I wasn't able to talk to greet them I still bowed to greet them, so it not like I was ignoring everyone. They said they don't have time to wait for me to improve, so they kicked me out. I would rather they didn't hire me in the first place, since they already know from the beginning.

My family also said it might have been one of the co-workers was trying to get rid of me, since my first day at work no one else said anything (she wasn't there that day), but the second day she saw me and said if I don't have to wear their uniform and don't have to greet the customer then I can't sit at their place or it'll affect the company's image. The others seem to listen to her, so I was force to stay in a room away from the customers with nothing to do until they call me out to input data. I was naive and follow their order. It made me look like I was playing while they have to do so many things by themself, that I can't even do anything, but in reality I wasn't allowed to do anything. After hearing what my family thought, her actions does seem suspicious, but I still don't understand, since I don't think I'm a threat for her. The boss hired me because it was too much for them to handle both greeting the customers and inputting the data, so if I was there to deal with the data then that mean less work for them, they should be happy about that.

I just feel hopeless about the future. The many symtoms I have pretty much are screaming "depression" for me, but I don't even have money to save myself because I couldn't get a job, which was those symtoms are the main cause of it. So it feel like I'm in an unbreakable circle. I don't know what to do anymore.

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User Profile: elliNel24
elliNel24 November 10th, 2022

Me also in my college life I don’t know how to survive my course especially I’m not good in doing computations in accounting like analysing transaction I’m not good of any of my major subjects clueless what will happen for the second sem and my third and fourth college life I don’t what my future holds

1 reply
User Profile: bestVase7265
bestVase7265 November 11th, 2022

It might be time to find another major then. Not everyone is talented at the same things. What kinds of things make you feel most comfortable to do?@elliNel24

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User Profile: bestVase7265
bestVase7265 November 11th, 2022

Bottom line is that they fired you for a disability and they are wrong. You could even sue them for it.

But the key is to try to help you find a job with people who can see your greatness despite your inability to speak sometimes. I bet you have lots of wonderful traits that those who are "abled" don't have.

What do you see as your greatest strengths? @unknowfuture712

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User Profile: unknowfuture712
unknowfuture712 OP November 12th, 2022

Thank you. But sadly, sueing at where I live cost more than what it bring back, so it was never an option for anyone here.

I've never really succeed at things I've done so far, so I don't really know my strengths. Best I can tell about myself is if anyone give me a clear order of what I have to do then I could do it well pretty fast. My friend also said I have sympathy and empathy, that I'm the only one who could understand the reason of her feelings. So I guess that's all I know about myself.

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User Profile: bestVase7265
bestVase7265 November 13th, 2022

You do definitely have strengths and I bet that empathy is one of of them. Unluckily, that usually doesn't pay too much. Luckily our worlds aren't just the job that we do, so remind yourself of that when you are outside of a work setting.

You mentioned doing data entry. How do you feel about those kinds of jobs? Are they usually the kind of thing where you can just be told what needs to be entered and do it?

Do you like typing in numbers or letters more?@unknowfuture712

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User Profile: unknowfuture712
unknowfuture712 OP November 13th, 2022

If was told clearly, usually after 1-2 week you can do data entry by yourself, since nowaday there are softwares to make data management easier. Learning how to use the software is not that hard, the hardest part probably is to understand the meaning of those data (but you still can do it if you don't fully understand).

But most of the time data entry is included in other jobs like accounting or some type of managerment jobs. There is database managerment, but that job always require you to have experience.

I think I like jobs that mostly about data managerment, but everywhere I go they always require good communication skill.

My friend has also try to help me by sending me a group that look for freelance translator, so I think I should give that a try.

1 reply
User Profile: bestVase7265
bestVase7265 November 14th, 2022

The freelance translation work sounds promising. I know that there are lots of jobs that you can do from home that might be easier in terms of oral communication.

If you keep experimenting with different kinds of jobs, you are going to find something.

Keep us informed as you continue to look.@unknowfuture712

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User Profile: worryBear
worryBear November 12th, 2022

Hoping you'll get a better job and appreciate ur worth

User Profile: Al3xand3r
Al3xand3r November 20th, 2022

@unknowfuture712

I know how that feels, to have a disability with regard to communication.
I have a stutter, and it impacted every aspect of my life. In the past, I've gone through some very dark moments, where I didn't know how to do to get over the situation caused by my paralyzing fear of talking in social contexts. I almost failed to complete my studies because of the fear of talking (e.g. presenting) in front of people. The thing is, my anxiety and fear of talking is far greater than the struggles (e.g. repetitions) caused by my stutter (at least that's how I perceived it). Nowadays I'm somewhat improved with regard to how I feel about it, and I can do a few things I couldn't do in the past; for example, I can do phone calls more easily than in the past. I was fortunate to eventually find a workplace where there's less need for the communication skills that I lack (e.g. speaking foreign languages, frequent meetings or video calls ). The downside is that the wage is much less; but at least it's something, I mean I was very troubled and fearful that I wouldn't find anything matching my background (studies). At present, however, is my personal life that suffers greatly, I mean I don't have a lover i.e. girlfriend (and never had). In fairness, it's likely not just my stutter to blame for this situation, I have many other issues.
As others have said, I hope you will eventually find something suitable for you, and also have caring and empathetic colleagues!