You can rant here
I know how it feels sometimes when you just want to rant, but don't know who to talk too or even if they will care. Well I care. You're not alone! Please feel free to say whats been on your mind lately, if you want someone to talk too or just want to rant away. I will listen.
What am I? Im just an annoying, whining girl who never has any positive to say. The most positive thing I can bear to say is ‘itll be fine or ‘it was okay. I feel like I strain every relationship I have and now I am on my own. No one cares about me and the few that say they do dont mean it. Ive failed at everything Ive turned my hand to and if this is what my life is then I dont want it anymore. Its taken me five years to complete my degree if I pass the next lot of retakes, how will I get a job that doesnt make me want to gauge my eyes out? I will get a 2:2 at best and what is that worth? I cant even get a temp job in a factory at the moment. I have no friends, no money, no intelligence and no future. Im trying to think of one thing I have and I cant.
Today at work, another coworker quit. We're extremely understaffed. I feel helpless. Knowing that my bf isn't answering my text is literally testing my patient. Sometimes I just want things to go my way....
I'll be reunited with my friend and it doesn't bring me joy, it just stresses me out instead. I really don't want to talk about how I feel, so I have to act like I'm fine in front of my flatmate and later my friend or else they'll get worried and ask me what's wrong. And my friend will probably bring her brother, a complete stranger, which doesn't make things easier. I just want to be alone. But I said they can come over. Sometimes it helps seeing friends, I know. Maybe it's better that way. Maybe it'll help or at least distract me for a few hours until I go back to feeling sorry for myself. I feel so empty. It's like all this pent-up anger inside me just transformed into a vast emptiness. I know this feeling of course, it happens sometimes. I know it'll get better eventually. But I just wish I wasn't like this. I'm on the verge of tears but they won't come out. And there are constantly ambulance sirens blaring outside, it's too much, too much. I can't close the window because i need air, my head is hurting and I need to breathe. I feel so pathetic. I want a hug but I also don't want anybody here, everyone just leave me alone!
@nomourners I get you and there is nothing wrong in being alone for some time. When you are feeling this way getting with people just make you more alone or atleast it did to me.
Take your time, one step a time ❤️
@sensitiveStrawberries8841 Thank you, this time it actually helped a lot. I've been feeling better since then :)
@nomourners I read this and I related to it soooo much. All I want to be is left alone and when I do see people I have to act like I'm ok. I had a mental breakdown because someone that not family came to a family event. I just was prepared to see them. You say it gets better so I'm going to trust you on it, but Ive pushed everyone out my life and as much as I want to care about being alone, that all I want to- left alone
@callmeRM Totally feel you there. As much as we feel like we need to be alone (and sometimes really do need to be), we definitely also need people. I notice that whenever I say no to something and then realise how much fun people are having without me. I get so afraid that they'll stop caring about me and eventually my wish will come true: I'll be completely alone and it will make me even more miserable. So I think sometimes it's worth it to push yourself through situations you don't want to be in, sometimes these things actually do turn out to be fun. Sometimes that's not the case, or sometimes you just cannot deal with it, and that's okay too. But yeah, it's difficult and it sucks :/ I hope you'll be better soon :)
Feeling like the weight of depression is getting somehow heavier and heavier everyday. Summer days are better than others, but the mornings are especially awful. How can I continue to live like this. I can't stop worrying and thinking on top of it. But I will struggle to fight on, although it seems I am losing this battle
I am so frustrated about people who just want to hear their own voice and get furious when you interrupt their 30 minute monologue. I had a boyfriend who when I asked why he got so mad (SO MAD) when we argued said "because I'm worried that I might be wrong". WHY are people so incapable of accepting when they are wrong/ having an actual dialogue? It is so furstrating trying to talk to someone who only wants to hear their own voice and have you agree with them - even if you know more or they arent making sense! Its almost exclusively white men who are like this too...
I had such an amazing phone call with my bf yesterday. We had planned going on a special date for a while. His work came up that letting him know that he has a small chance of having to come in. It bums me out cause I just miss him sooo dearly....
After having to deal with my wife cheating and now a divorce where I'm being screwed by the system for child support. Relationships are short lived and really have nothing to look forward to. I spend pretty much every night drinking myself to sleep because being awake is just irritating. Some have tried to help me but all their efforts have been in vain. Just don't know what to do now.
They know who they are so don't need adressing. I am not who you want me to be I am never am gonna be it's not a phase or anything I am me and that's okay I've made my peace with it I just wish you didn't keep trying to change me stop pressuring me to change I don't need to! I can't be myself around you i feel so trapped coz you are so focused on everything being what you want not what I want. I don't Know what I want to do with my life what the future holds and I'm just trying to survive right now okay! You think everything is so easy do ya oh everything is so easy and I'm just lazy and don't care trying being me for a day take a hike in my shoes for a day you won't frickin survive. Please shut up and listen to me please start caring and stop putting me down I put myself down enough I don't need it from you. You say it's what's best for me it's coz you care if you fffing cared you would see I'm hanging on by a thread. I can't be what you want your only making me worse you make me feel so bad and the. You be nice and stuff and make me feel like the bad guy but it's not my fault it's yours! You always tell me to be nice how about you be nice for once! It wouldn't hurt you to be nice once in a while and say something good about me instead of just talking bad about me. And I ain't what you think you have no idea about me I'm so much more than what you think I'm not stupid or lazy or ignorant I'm good I have my own smarts and I'm sick and tired of how you treat me I'm mentally and emotionally exhausted and you think that can be fixed with sleep. Please your ignorant the only good thing is my dog. I can't wait till I'm free of you and I can be me and I can start living and not just surviving
So I was surprised with a cute dinner. However, I misunderstood what time. They meant later in the night which I was down. Me being me though gets impatient. Like why can't you answer the phone and let me know. But nope, I have to wait till later. Again see I catch myself being impatient and anxious. Maybe because I really do dread time.
I have this theory that my bf is drunk. He needs help if he keeps drinking this way........I don't know maybe I'm overthinking or there was miscommunication..
