You can rant here
I know how it feels sometimes when you just want to rant, but don't know who to talk too or even if they will care. Well I care. You're not alone! Please feel free to say whats been on your mind lately, if you want someone to talk too or just want to rant away. I will listen.
I see that profanity has to be censored or shortened on this site. That's not good on a day when I REALLY need to vent and let it all out! I will say that the culprits are insomnia, anxiety, stress, and poor health. I keep going from one website to another, trying to let out my frustrations, but they don't allow profanity (or they automatically censor any I use). Where can I vent that DOES allow profanity without censorship?
First day at uni and I kinda hated it. I feel so alone I don't have anyone with whom I connect with. I have made some friends before which made me regret being with them,as they were kinda problematic characters,and that fact made me someone people don't try to engage with. Now I am with the wrong People,if I leave them I will be alone, I feel like there is no good thing for me. And it's worse this year because I have got plenty of group projects and noone to work with. It's so lonely, I feel like I am hanging on by a thread.
@Abeach02
Hi, Beach,
Congratulations on facing something very stressful--going to uni. If they are the wrong people to be with, they aren't your friends. You don't want friends like them. I have been in your shoes. I had friends that were the wrong friends. It only built bad habits in me, and took time away from me actually meeting and getting to know people who I would have/should have been building friendships with. You can do it. Come here when you are lonely. You can always talk to people here. That has helped me through times when I feel lonely. best of luck and god bless you
lost one of my students today. It hasn't hit me yet and I feel like i've been distracting myself all day just to avoid thinking about it. I just feel so sad for him because he didn't deserve it. He didn't deserve any of it and now he's gone. I just saw him at work on friday and he's gone and i don't know what to do or how to process it. and now i think it'll hit me when i least expect it. I didn't know him that well because i literally just met him 3 weeks ago and now something like this happens.
@BrokenAngelxx
It's okay to take your time to grief about the loss of your student. People grieve in different ways. It's helpful to talk with a colleague about this, because it affects them too. Maybe find a way to honor that student physically - like writing down your feelings and what happened to cause it.
I lost a student last year. He was a big part of the community and the students and coaches felt it. The students honored the student by writing on poster boards messages that they wanted to leave him. I saw students do that during lunch. I went because I wanted too. Then I did lots of crying after school because the journal prompt asked students to either write about something or about messages they want to give about their classmate. It's overwhelming, but crying helped and talking about it with other teachers.
I'm rambling. You also don't have to stay in grief if that's not where you're at. Sometimes you want to distract and talk about your interests like a fun tv show you're watching. Mine is currently Grey's Anatomy. I like the sassy Meredith Grey, Christina Yang, and Miranda Bailey. Dr. Bailey is hilarious of em all.
There are so many thoughts running through my head, I get panic attacks but I don't like people to know how much I hurt because I grew up teaching myself to tell them what they want to hear and I have to keep smiling because that's what they know me as. A person who never stops smiling. And if I'm anything else they hate me.
Aww that is kind and thoughtful and nice of you. Thank you very much.
3 Things I'm Excited for today.
-It's daylight saving ending. I can have 1 more hour of sleep this Sunday.
-I'm happy that I'm comfortable with myself now, and moving with the ebb, and talking to my community I'm physically around. Colleagues and clients really showed me to.
-I'm excited to take up space, and see the actual realisticness of life, instead of a made up version.
3 Things I'm Looking Forward to.
-Finding a therapist who is CBT, DBT, and emotion based for me.
-Catching up on reading a book, about the dead. Jodi Picoult ooooh, she fantastic writer. (I'll read it little by little)
-Doing small mini mundane activity like, making page ART
-Cooking 1 small veggie/meat dish
-Completing 3 more days of the finance bootcamp and budgeting - so I know how much I can spend this November!!
-Doing lean arm exercises, to build up my strength and lean arms
-Learning leg exercises to feel tone (perhaps lose tummy weight)
-Hanging out with my bf on the week or with J gf
-I'm doing so well.
-Remember 1 thing I'm proud of TODAY, 1 thing.
It won't let me rant. It won't let me share out what I wanted.
Code "064"
It's Monday night, which means I'm feeling some worry. I'm worried about school tomr, because I'm not sure the assignments the students have. I think it's 3rd grade to 6th grade in the classroom. I'll have to know some math in multiplication and use "I statements" like I see this person name do this, now what about "?? using some multiplication".
I'm also worried I don't say hi/hello to the other person in the room. I have to think about the relationship I will cultivate. And being present with the day. Um, other than that, I know in my gut, I'll remember that I met the teaching aide who's nice. Now, I have to think of things about me that I can share with him too. EXAMPLE - I'm pet-sitting/playing Kirby's new video game. Hearing about the snow. Would you rather hike to see the snow/not?
@tealBear2472
It turned easier than I thought.
I saw students work on addition in the thousands place. And work on adding decimals in the thousandths place. We also worked on summary, and saying sounds.
@wonderousSigns7
I know this is going to sound stupid, (TW for possible interpretations of a mild eating disorder)
But I can't get over it, I work out, I eat pretty healthy, I throw up my meals if I feel I've eaten to much or eaten something unhealthy,
I'm not over weight but I feel like I need to be skinnier, in my brain I KNOW I'm fine and I need to get over myself, but I can't, I eat a sandwich that was to big and 2 minutes later I'm in the bathroom puking my guts up,
On top of that I'm losing a bit of weight, the scale is going down (at a health rate dw) but I swear my stomach looks bigger every day.
I just don't understand, in my brain I know I don't need to do what I do, I know it's not good to obsess over stupid selfish things like that, but I do and I don't understand it. I just hate how I look so much and if I can't have an ugly face and an ugly body so Idk. And I put on a fairly confident show at schools and with my friends, I really don't know but I'm so sick of it and idk how to deal with this crap
Sorry,
