how to deal with the guilt that depression brings?
Hello there, my name is cierra and I've been struggling with depression for the last 3 years almost 4. I've had to deal with alot over these years and even before the depression started. I wanted to know if anyone knew how to let yourself of the hook and get rid of the guilt I've been feeling for so long.? I was doing good since almost a year now but two weeks ago I could feel my depression creep its way back and all the guilt I had pushed in the back of my mind has come flooding back. I don't want to keep putting my family through this. Does anyone have any suggestions? Or advice?
Hey, Cierra!
It's nice that you're here... And I've been in the same place as you sometimes, specially last year. I suffer with depression since I was really young, and it took me a lot of time to learn how to deal with it. It may be different for you, but here's what have been working for me for the last fouryears: I try to keep my thoughts positive, I need my mind being as healthy and good as I can, since I spend too much time immersed in thoughts. Every time I feel the depression "approaching" I try to find something good to do, something that will make me feel better: Sometimes I make some physical exercises (because of the released endorphins), sometimes I marathon funny tv shows, sometimes I just write. When I write two good things happen: 1) I organize my thoughts and feelings. 2) I feel like a huge weight left my shoulders.
Everyone has a way of dealing with it, it's good to find a healthy and helpful one. And sometimes we will always feel a little guilty, because it affects people around us, we should use it as a motivation to improve our situation, that may be hard, but everything is right now, right? Work for ourselves and end up making others better.
I hope that helped.
Take care!
Thank you for your feed back and advice Hadran. I really appreciate it. It is definitely hard to push those negative and bad thoughts when I am very low but I am trying to keep myself busy. As for the guilt, it's when I'm really low that I feel like I don't deserve to feel better about what I've put my husband and family through. I still cry when I think of what has happened during my depression moments. When I cling to happy moments during these times I feel even more guilty. It's a work in progress. I never thought it would be this hard though. One day at a time right!
You're welcome! And yes, it is hard and it's also a long process... The guilt always makes everything worse.So we must try to keep strong and live each day at a time, like you said! If you want to talk more about that, feel free to message me!
i agree totally with what hadrani said! and i completely agree that it is a work in progress. it's good that you know that the guilt is caused by your depression... i think one of the most helpful things would be to isolate those feelings, to tell yourself, "okay, my depression is getting the better of me right now, and i need to work through these thoughts," and then to try to change your thought processes.
there's some really good tips on cognitive restructuring in the 7cups anxiety guide:
https://www.7cups.com/anxiety-help/
since guilt causes all kinds of anxiety, and anxiety can cause guilt, the guide might be helpful to you.
and i'm always around to talk! my inbox is always open, feel free to send me messages if you need me.
Thank you for the tip. I just know that if I get a handle On my guilt I can get through this depression alot easier. Today's a semi good day so I'm able to say this but On my bad days I feel like I don't deserve to feel better about what I've put my family through.
