looking for sites/orgs that offer free online consultation in the philippines

I don't want to self-d1agnose.

I have posted 3 threads mentioning depress1on and su1c1de. I don't want to self-diagnose as I may only be experiencing severe sadness. I have been suffering from it since 8th grade. During the pandemic, I tried to detach myself from people to keep me sane. In 10th grade, it all came back after my relationship with my family got even worse than ever. The school year just started yet I am experiencing it again. I want to seek professional help that offers free online consultation as my family doesn't believe in depress1on and they basically don't believe that I am struggling. I am worried of myself as it became my coping mechanism to hurt myself such as punch1ng myself, excess1ve sk1n scratch1ng, scratch1ng my scalp and I sometimes dr1nk med1cat1ons even though I am not sick. Whenever I let my emotions take over me, I always think of just k1ll1ng myself but I am afraid of leaving my mom alone since I don't have any siblings. Even at my lowest point, I'm always considering what she would feel but at the same time, I really want to give it all up and just d1e. I need help but all I could do is either open up to my friends or hurt myself when I don't get the chance to talk about it.

I am 16 years old and my only source of money is my allowance. I currently don't have money so it would be a very big help if the online consultation is free.