Can't stop thinking about depression.
Hi guys, I was just wondering: do you ever get obsessed over the idea that you have depression? Like you can't stop researching about it and even when doing something else, you are thinking stuff like "I have depression" "why do i have depression" "what can I do to stop depression".
I have been diagnosed with major depressive disorder and anxiety disorder 6 months ago, under meds and therapy. Ever since I knew that, I just can't stop ruminating about my depression. It seems like my medication isn't working and i have switched 2 medications already.
I feel like these thoughts are disruptive and taking over me. I just want to learn how to stop thinking about my illness all the time. I want to focus on important things without these thoughts barging in and taking away my focus. It's like I'm hyperaware of my condition.
Am I the only one who feels and thinks this way? :/
Thank you!
@ramonaquimby
First I want to say how brave it is to seek out the help you need. Depression tends to take from us the drive to care for ourselves in the best way. I was interesting you used the word rumination. That locked cycle of thought is very familiar to me. Small thoughts about my condition lead to bigger ones and I freak out a little. Then the cycle starts over. So no, you are not alone. I hope you have spoken with your therapist about how these thoughts are impacting you. They have some really neat techniques you can use to stop or shape those thoughts in to positives. Once again, props to you for being self aware. Short of the therapeutic intervention I have found that a meditation practice that focuses on compassion for yourself and others that suffer can be very helpful. Some research suggest it can be quite powerful in helping with depressed feelings. Check it out for yourself and maybe ask your therapist about it. It seems that our brains can't be both depressed and compassionate at the same time. Sort of a depression safety valve. I wish you peace. J
@SimplyBeing Thank you so much for your response. I haven't told my therapist about it yet, but I will on our next session. So far what has helped me is trying to live in the present, but at the same time acknowledging the intrusive thoughts about depression then letting them go, instead of supressing them. It takes a lot of practice and patience, but i hope i will get used to these techniques soon. :) I'll also try meditation, as you have suggested.
@ramonaquimby
I am so glad you are talking to your therapist about your thoughts. I think you are right about your approach of acknowledging the thoughts and letting them go. Fighting them just feeds them energy. I wish you peace. J
