False reality
Hello everyone. I just wanted to share something. So for the past months I've been zoning out or completely creating a different "reality" in my head just so I can avoid thinking of the real life . And I've been doing it so much that when I "come back" to the reality I live in usually I have a meltdown or feel a lot of pain and all of my suicidal thoughts are back. I'm starting to think that this is not a good coping mechanism , but at least when I do it I feel numb which I guess is better than to be in pain. I'm kinda scared that at some point I won't be able to tell the difference between what's real and what's not. I don't know what to do at this point, to be honest I have completely given up on life anyway lol. I probably should crazy.
Hey anonymous, every human daydreams. Zoning out for longer period of time and imaging yourself in an alternate reality where it's all unicorns and rainbows, I've done it to ignore the present misery. I still do it sometimes. Coz this reality is like a purgatory, it's so much to take in and process. I understand. All the thoughts of I wish I didn't exist. But I tried this. Instead of running away from what messes my head and makes me regret all my life choices, I think about it, I cry about it, but how long can you cry for? Hours? Alright. Then what? That's when I try to separate the fragments. Think of what could have been done, what can I do about it, why does it bother me? Should I just let it go or what? Take all the time you need. This isn't easy I know. Well it's no harm thinking of a reality where everything's fine. Don't give up on life mate. I don't know what you're going through, but I imagine it's really though. You can talk to me. Anyone over here infact. And you won't go crazy don't worry❤️ all the best. All lovex