I have depression and I don't know why.
My name is Abigail, you can call me Abby. I struggle with severe depression, and I've had it for over a year now.
I don't know why I have depression. My life is great. I have amazing parents, an amazing dog, I'm financially stable, I have a best friend that treats me great, I have straight A's in school.
And yet, I still feel depressed. I feel empty, worthless, angry, suicidal. The whole shabang. And it makes me feel horrible, because I know so many people have it a million times worse than me.
I feel like I'm not supposed to ever feel negative emotions. I feel like someone with a life as good as mine should be happy all the time.
But I'm not. And I don't know why.
Has anyone ever explained to you what depression is? It is a physical imbalance of chemicals in your brain. That can happen to anyone no matter how "great" their life is. You aren't doing anything wrong.
But it sounds like it is time to call on the resources that you have for some help. Are you seeing a doctor or a therapist? It can take a bit of time, but those people can really help you find a better balance. And you do deserve it.
If you ever want to vent here, please feel free. No judgment. @AbigailMadden
@bestVase7265 I don't have a doctor, haven't been to one since I was 6 years old lol. And I don't have a therapist, because I would have to tell my parents about everything that's going on, and I don't want to tell them. I'm also too anxious to get on one of those suicide hotlines, so that crosses off that option. It IS nice to be able to vent on here though
As long as you’re taking steps to try to make it better that’s all that matters
Of course. Vent here any time. It can really help to have a spot where people aren't going to judge you. We have been there before.
You do deserve to feel better though. Sometimes it starts with the little stuff like getting outside daily, eating healthy food and drinking fluids. How are those things going right now? They can be hard with depression. @AbigailMadden
@bestVase7265 Well I've been trying to get my physical health in order recently, so I've been drinking a lot of water and I take a quarter mile walk every day. I still eat a little unhealthy, but I've been in the process of moving recently and plan to change my diet when I move into the new house
Beautiful job with the walking! That is great. The rest of that basic stuff can fall in place more slowly.
How was the rest of your day today? I hope that it was a bit more peaceful for you. @AbigailMadden
@bestVase7265 It was definitely a bit better. I had a bad panic attack when I was home alone, but I'm better now
Panic attacks are no fun. They are so draining.
One thing that surprised me that helped a little was drinking a glass of cold ice water. It seemed to reset my brain. @AbigailMadden
Just letting you know that I have been thinking about you. @AbigailMadden
Hoping that things are well. @AbigailMadden
@AbigailMadden I can relate. Depression doesn't care about your social class or life circumstances- it doesn't have to have a 'real' reason. My mom gets annoyed at me for having mental problems, citing how comfortably I live and how privledged I am- please don't shame yourself. It's already hard enough to deal with depression without the shame/ need to justify it.
Hi abigail
I also have depression since my childhood it is very difficult to live with depression
Hi can we talk I’m feeling quite depressed myself although I messed up my marriage so that’s my depression and I’ve been smoking too much but now I’m quitting
@AbigailMadden it doesn't matter who's had it easy or hard, who's rich or poor, don't matter where you came from, we all feel we all struggle just the same as anyone else 💖 mental health doesn't need a reason it to rear it's ugly head. Right now it's important to be kind to yourself to reach out when your feeling low💖 and remember we are all here for you 💗 gives you a giant tiny hug 💗