Just gonna be straightforward
I've been medicated for almost 2 years now I think, I've been suffering from depression and anxiety for much longer, I've always been an overthinker but I think it's gotten to the breaking point, I smoke weed a lot now, and of course my mind thinks weird stuff, but that stuff has been getting more and more specific, I've been remembering bad signs psychologically I had during childhood etc, but that eventually caused me to go searching for answers, there's a lot of things that could explain the way I am, or the way I think I am at least, ADHD, Bi polar, BPD, BSD, schizophrenic. I thought a lot about all of these and still don't know what ones if any of them are the problem, but now I'm getting worse, remembering incidents in my childhood that could be possible causes, and even remembering/seeing flashes of things that I don't even know happened, then I remembered a time I fell out of a window backwards and fell and hit the back of my head on the concrete, and now I even feel pain where that happened, but as time when on and the more revelations I had, I finally realised I could be going insane, I realised all of this could be me overthinking and being delusional, I think I overthought to the point where I overthought myself overthinking, which sounds stupid but yeah, now I don't know if I found out why I am how I am or if I'm going insane
Have you talked to your parents about this? I feel like they would be able to help you more than me
@AlphaPheonix4720 no, I don't know how to tell them, I've always been bad at opening up to them about this stuff
@TylerM
marijuana is a hallucinogen and unless you live somewhere where its legal and its regulated and a legitimate company produces and sells it it can have other things in it also but even if it is like i said its a hallucinogen and it should be considered a medication your doctor should know your taking it just like the doctor prescribing your meds should know what your taking so theres no drug interactions - some drugs have a very bad effect on you if taken with certain other meds - and yes a bad effect could be psychosis its called drug induced psychosis and happens all the time so i would say the best thing to do is tell your doctor your symptoms and everything your taking thats what you should always do with your doctor you dont want to be misdiagnosed with anything that would only make the situation worse taking psych meds you dont need
@jennysunrise8 my doctor knows I smoke, he's fine with it, it's the synthetic shit he rightfully hates and I've researched how it interacts with my medication (150mg of venlafaxine and 100mg of quetiapine) and they don't seem to conflict at all, I've found taking my meds after smoking calms down my mind and sorta levels me out a lil bit
@TylerM
the problem might be with the synthetic ive heard of people who start hearing voices taking the synthetic its not related in any way to cannabis its just a mix of different things to make you hallucinate and it does and it affects different people differently maybe see how your thinking is without the synthetic :)
@jennysunrise8 nah I don't do synthetics I only smoke weed
@TylerM
oh sorry i misunderstood it can have some good effects like calming you down also good for pain but it is a hallucinogen and some might be different varieties and have a different/stronger affect on you so the hallucinogenic effects you could consider a side effect if your doing it to calm you down are the side effects worth it or is it bothering you too much there are other things your doctor can prescribe that doesnt have that side effect and also other things you could smoke that can give you the positive what your wanting without the side effects you dont want
@TylerM Smoking bad. Weed bad.
@TylerM Hey, i read through your thread and i hope i'm not being intrusive, but i read a lot of comments that seemed to focus on your weed use? Idk, it kind of felt like you werent getting the support you needed, though i dont think these people meant anything bad by it. I just want to say that if your doctor says it's okay, then you're valid. I live in a place where it is legal and i go to a university that does a lot of research on the medical uses of weed, so it isn't as bad as everyone says it is, especially if a doctor says it doesn't interact with your meds.
Im sorry you're dealing with all this, and it must be very difficult to deal with your thoughts, especially if you struggle with things like bpd, and dissociative thoughts. I also have trouble with thoughts that wont leave, or my mind gettign trapped in loops i don't want it to, so i hope you feel (at least a little) less alone. It sucks. Especially when you're expected to function just like everyone else, but it feels like you can't. You aren't alone - and i hope you know you can find support here.
(I was to post a disclaimer: i don't endorse drug addictions, and if you find yourself getting addicted to anything, you should seek help and support as soon as possible. i just wanted to provide some support to someone who didnt seem to get a lot of that)
@natchoo @TylerM
Also, you don't sound stupid. It isn't shameful to be dealing with this. PTSD and other disorders that efff with your mind are real struggles (from one survivor to another). Im glad you're trying to find help and support. You're still a valuable person, even if it doesn't feel that way.
