Choice and Chronic Illness

@AffyAvo

Really lovely article. It reminds me of when a doctor told me that I had a "discipline problem", not a medical induced issue caused by my disability. Or when my eye doctor told me to get a job, in spite of being clueless about my issues that kept me housebound. It's sad when doctors cannot even recognize the distinction...

@AffyAvo Amazing job focusing on what you can control and taking the right outlook on making the most out of your situation. I struggle with accepting living with a chronic disability/ chronic pain but you perspective helped.

@AffyAvo

Beautiful article. Thank you for sharing it to the community.

I have been discriminated against by my school due to my chronic illness. They don't understand that I do not choose to miss school. I do not choose to stay in bed all day. I do not choose to be fatigued to the point even turning over in bed is something I ponder for several minutes, debating whether it's worth the pain to be just a little bit more comfortable. I do not choose to go 32 hours without sleep. I do not choose to be plagued by pain that has burried itself deep in my muscles, so much so that I can feel it in every tendon and ligament. I do not choose to feel like I got hit by a train every morning.

Though... I do choose to get up on days when I can muster up the energy. I do choose to opt for a blouse and heels instead of sweat pants and sneakers. I do choose to put makeup on and present myself as 'put together' in the public eye to avoid stares and snarky comments from kids who are "normal." People only see me when I am put together. They only see the side of me that I want them to see. The side of me that has makeup and combed hair, good posture and a really good fake smile.

More people need to understand this. That chronic illness is NOT a choice, but the way we present ourselves IS a choice. People always tell me "You don't look sick!" Friends never understand why I sometimes have to cancel plans last minute. Nobody takes time to give us the light of day. They fail to read deeper, only looking at us like picture books instead of the novels that we are. And that goes for everyone. They don't realize the daily struggle of another person, and are often too quick to assume and judge another.

Thanks for sharing! Really needed to ramble that off my chest lol