Weekly Check In March 23rd - March 29th

@gentleSun78

Not doing very well in lots or pain and struggling alot atm. Just wanna help others. Given up trying to help myself lol xD

@gentleSun78 Hi friends!

My disability has an effect on my mental health. I am blind, and I would push that away. The aftermath of my childhood of denial from my family has resulted in PTSD which has put me into intensive outpatient treatment 5x a week.

I may have had a negative experience growing up, but I have the power to change things for the better. I strive to do advocacy work, educate others, and stay positive. Helping people on 7 Cups also helps me live a positive lifestyle that I can be proud of.

This week is going okay so far. I have been pretty relaxed for the most part which is good. One negative thing is that next week we start online learning at my school due to COVID-19, and I am not sure how that is going to work in general, let alone with my visual impairment and need for accommodations. Definitely a little bit of uncertainty, but I will hopefully have answers soon.

I hope everyone is doing well, and managing the time off. Have an awesome week, and stay positive!

@gentleSun78

How are you? This week has been tough. For the Corona, I had to walk a lot. And the pressure is high. Using a big basket duty and that makes walking harder. Taking it all home and under this pressure. Where all think we are hamstering, while we just get our things. I also had to get a lot of things this time, as I had stayed in to long and needed just everything.

It was physically tough. Staying in is easier. But I do work too much because I am being indoors. When I can go outside. I do a lot of things that make my rhythm changing, which makes my body do different things. Now it is all the same and too much of all. I am exhausted from being indoors.

I also, work 24/7 on the coronavirus. I write, I research and keep working on better ideas to solve the coronavirus. I am a bsc.health of science student and environmental psychologist, so, this is a time to work a lot. I love it, but I am exhausted from all the pressure and especially during shopping, and in the country by the government, where they are doing so much wrong, and I actually wrote years about this pandemic to come. I studied social epidemiology in 2013, and we were preparing for a new outbreak ever since. I studied management and a lot of studies to change behavior of workers in a lot of jobs, where they did not understand kids get viruses every year, and some can be an epidemic and pandemic, and it needs a certain behavior to not cause problems. And these people locally were frauding and abusing kids, so it has been a tough ride, and now they fall into their own mistakes, and finally see what I meant all these years.

But now after this tough ride, where none spoke about it and I started my company, I get the flood of their faults even more on top of me.

I do see lots of progress. But especially because my work has been successful internationally, I made lots of friends online and in our professions, and now I see their friends MD's and my friends who are MD die. So, since I am now BSc Health of Science student, who wants to do an MD master after this, to become MD/psychologist and did study the most on environment and social epidemiology and all kinds of environments, It hits a bit harder now. All these people were my teacher, my friend, fellow students in courses and studies, and now they die, and their friends die. And we strive together to get the word across and we stand together and make even more friends help out. But it is hard to see these wise people die. And that makes me work harder and harder and harder, especially as they all break down mentally now and ask for psychologists and had the toughest thing to face I could ever think of, all these deaths, they must let die and can not help, as the equipment is out. And I keep trying to get people to make more and send them, and try with everyone to get it solved. But it is hard to see many MD cry and die, to be honest, its harder to see that, than all these death patients. And that is a new feeling to get through as a student that studied very long on this, since 2013, and now as BSc Health science student, to become me an MD, but we had years of no SARS, and years of preparing where none listened to us, and now they all die, all these amazing people. So, I try to continue their work and let everyone find their work and that will be a next step getting their word across as their last work, we can spread around so we all keep working on this. But it is hard. apparently MD die a lot in pandemics. All have kids, and families, and are very healthy people normally, examples in society. People that work shifts of 24 hours on some days, and some other days 96 hours, etc. And now we have to miss them forever.

So, I imagine my friends at my university are the next MD dying in the next pandemic. I have an interview tomorrow and try to be a good corona expert and get this across the dying MD and my new student friends that will be the next pandemic, dead people. So, we must take this seriously and work hard. And get more people into studying biology and MD studies, seriously cause they die from this and we need to solve all this. There is so much work to do. We will get a bit of rest after SARS all of us, but it is something that will keep coming back, every few years. THE last SARS to now was from 2003 to 2020. We had some other epidemics, but there will be a next SARS pandemic in another few years.

I am still handicapped, and that is very exhausting every day in any way. So, now in this pandemic, I am even more exhausted. And you all?

@gentleSun78

I've been struggling, my pain is constant but at least it's low. I'm distressed because I'm unable to see my physicians about problems that have come up, thanks to the shelter in place orders out. It's been a lot to process.

How does your disability affect your mental health? - Sometimes it can have a negative effect if you feel limited.

Are there things you do to reduce the negative impact that a disability has on your mental health? - Although I don't have a disability I still make a video to rant so that I can let out my negative emotions (I never post the video)

How are things going this week? What's going well? What's causing some difficulties? - This week has been a good week