Insensitivities
I don't usually post in forums like this because I know my disability doesn't seem like one compared to a lot of things, although I do get accommodations under the ADA. I have very severe food allergies. Severe meaning I have reactions from breathing nut dust or eating something using a serving spoon that's touched nuts. A friend of mine constantly talks about how he likes the texture of nuts in his food. Okay, we all have our preferences and he's usually respectful and understanding. Well, tonight he had to go and tell me that my cookies are good, but he'd like to get some of my dough and put walnuts in it. He thinks he'd find them even better. That just bothered me a lot. It felt so insensitive because I could literally die from putting nuts into the cookies (yes, he'd do it at his own house, but still). It made me feel inadequate because of my allergies, which I can't help. My cookies are still very good without nuts.
And it frustrates me because attitudes like that end up excluding me from events. Can't go to the holiday party because people bring mixed nuts. Can't go to a church picnic because people want nuts. It won't k*ll someone to not have nuts in the brownies once in a while, but it can k*ll me to be around them eating said brownies. It's just so insensitive and it makes me feel like my life doesn't matter as much to people as a snack. Or they comply but they give me rude looks and make snide comments. It just hurts.
@LunaKisses95
helo , i can imagine it may seem restrictive but dont expect all the people to understand you perfectly.
you know your alergies , what you can eat , so you are fine with yourself.
It doesn't have to be restrictive and miss events , you can go here , without eating
( events are more about socialization )
hope the best and have a nice weekend ,
efi😊
@resourcefulVision55 It's not that simple when it's in the air though. One needs to be able to breathe.
@resourcefulVision55 I have airborne allergies so I can't be around bowls of loose nuts, and there's also the cross-contamination issue. People don't have to bring mixed nuts to a party, period.
@LunaKisses95 I have food allergies that aren't so severe, but I do have others that are and prevent me from going places too. It sucks.
Your friend's comments are odd in my opinion. If he would like the same cookies with nuts it would make more sense just to ask for the recipe without even commenting on how they would be better with nuts.
Do you find people tend to be accomodating for events if you ask? I know if I were having people over, if someone had a severe nut allergy I would just say no nuts, one of the guests has a severe allergy. I know some things can't totally be controlled for (like my house isn't a nut free house), but I would do something like run things through the dishwasher again to ensure a peanut buttery finger hadn't touched a spoon after washing as could happen day to day in our house. Sometimes people need to have it explained too, especially as allergy severity varies so much (like my sister is allergic to some nuts, but she will eat a non-nut cookie that was on a plate with cookies that had them and not have a reaction). I do think there are those who would be happy to accomodate, they just don't know what needs to be done (and yes, there are those who won't, unfortunately).
@AffyAvo sometimes people accommodate, but more often than not they just ignore the rules. I've found it can be generational. The boomers and millennials are horrible about allergies, but gen X and the zoomers are great about theme probably because they're more used to accommodating them in schools. It's lousy but what makes it worse is when people are unkind. :(
