I feel so alone.
I don't know if this is the right place to talk about it but, well, I'll try.
I'm 25 and I've never been diagnosed with an ED, nor that I know. But...
When I was 17 I've been diagnosed with lactose intollerance. I had a lot of stomach ache and so but in that period I managed just fine.
Some years ago my problem intensified. I don't know if it was because of anxiety or some trauma I haven't identified yet, but I've started to fear food. I've began to eat less - I don't even like eating - taking away everything that could arm me. I've seen doctors, I've taken some exams for gluten and so but I was negative to other disoders.
I'm like [edited by Anomalia to remove weight specifics], probably not so thin but, well, a lot weak. I'm seeing a nutritionist, but I'm still very afraid of food and eating. It's not about becoming fat or something, it's more like suffering and feeling pain while I'm away from home.
Some months ago I woke up in the middle of the night with stomach ache and I went to the bathroom, but I guess I freaked out for some reason because I remember calling my parents later and fainting in the hallway.
Some weeks ago I got scared and had another panic attack, and now I'm starting to be afraid of my period, eating and going to the bathroom too. All physiological functions I shouldn't fear, right?
But I'm afraid I am falling into a deep hole here, and I can't find anyone that ever felt like me before.
I can't see a therapist because of money, and... I don't know. I'm scared and tired.
@Vitani You can always talk to me, if you wanna. I'm open for talking about it. I have an ED too :)
@EvilRegalsReadToo that's so sweet, thank you so much ❤️
@Vitani This is absolutely the right place to talk about this and I'm glad that you opened up here. Eating disorders don't necessarily have to be about fearing being fat - there are lots of reasons that someone might struggle with eating issues and you're not alone in this. You said that you can't see a therapist right now, but there may be other options - many places have support groups for eating disorders, there are places you can get pro-rated therapy (basically pay based on what you can afford) - often universities that have programs for counseling will have reduced fee therapy with their students, supervised by a professor, or even talking about what's going on here with a listener. I know you're feeling scared and tired right now, but I promise that there is hope. And I'm sending you some extra courage and energy to help today 
