Eating Disorder Community - How do you actually feel today?
I skip meals, and I hate when people try to get me to eat. I want someone to notice I'm not okay, but I don't want someone to fuss over me and tell me to eat. It's been eleven months since I've started skipping meals, and I've told two people in hopes of getting help, but they just gave me bad advice and a teacher found out I skip lunch, but didn't press when I said I didn't like the food. I'm almost always cold because of way and going up and down a single flight of stairs leaves me breathless.
@withoutmuse - I'm so sorry that when you have reached out to people for support, they haven't given you what you were looking for. Do you feel like they would be open to supporting more if you were able to express what you need? Or is there someone who might?
I can understand wanting help, but not wanting people fussing over what you're eating, but I think it's a natural reaction of those who care about you to focus on what they can see the issue is (the not eating) when they don't know how to deal with the emotions underneath it. Often, it takes talking to a professional to start dealing with those.
I am glad that you're reaching out here - I think it's a big and courageous step, and if you ever want to talk 1-1, my PMs are always open. Take care
@withoutmuse I'm sorry you feel that way. I can relate. But, is that why people get so cold? Is that why I have random cold flashes throughout the day? I didn't know. I've been skipping both lunch and breakfast for two years, so my body is used to not having any calories early on in the day.
I feel like I'll never get this weight off
@turquoiseYard6069 - What happens if you don't? At the end of the day, it's all to normal to find ourselves focused on our weight and assuming that everything would be better if we could just lose it, but what would life look like if you were able to love yourself fully as you are?
If I don't get the weight off I will continue to be unhealthy. My blood pressure will just get worse. Diabetes worse. Depression and anxiety worse. I will continue to hear it from my family. That's actually the worst part of it. The judgement from family. @Anomalia
I feel so tired. I don't have enough energy to concentrate on my schoolwork and I'm soo cold.
I'm trying to get better, I really am!
@poet9 - I'm really proud of you for trying to get better and for reaching out here for support. Do you have people in your life that you are talking to about this and who are supporting you through your recovery? I think one of the most important pieces of recovery is being able to lean on others when you need to. If you ever want to talk about it, you can PM me anytime. Take care, sweetie - you can beat this!
@Anomalia Thanks you, that's really nice of you to say! I don't actually have someone to talk to about this, but I'll reach out if I feel the need to talk. Thanks again! <3
i really need to be hungry... i can't take eating anymore...i cant take life anymore
@Shallan I'm glad that you wrote here about your self, it's not simple to open up like this. I understood what you mean, I felt it. Sometimes there are periods more difficult, don't blame your self too much, but you don't have to give up. You are strong and you can move forward.
@Malinconia thanks...but gosh.. i'm nly gaining weight...it's scary...and my head is screaming t stop eating...i guess lunch today had been the last meal for a couple of days... idk how t handle all this anymore
@Shallan Life is complicated and we are human and sometimes it all seems overwhelming. You are strong and being able to ask help proves it. This community will help you, but if you figure out that you need someone professional you have all the rights to do it. Don't be ashemed. Forgive your self for what you did yesterday and start tomorrow with a positive mind. You are not your eating disorder.
I struggle a lot everyday with my Ed and it's really hard for me to admit I have one. I try not to have anyone know about it because I'm afraid people will be mean to me. I just want to be good enough but I don't feel like I'm good enough
@Youareworthit1118 - I can definitely relate to what you're saying, but I will tell you now - you are absolutely good enough. You don't need to be anyone else or do anything else - you are enough as you are and you deserve to feel that way about yourself.
It is really hard to admit that you have an eating disorder, and I'm proud of you for opening up here - that's not easy! I would love to help support you in recovery because I know that you can get there. If you ever want to chat, feel free to message me. And remember - you are good enough, you are strong enough, you are smart enough, you are brave enough, YOU ARE ENOUGH!
Stay strong
I don't admit to anyone I have an ED. I keep it quiet. But sometimes I have heard them whispering in the hallway or they have told me to go eat something. They don't realize that that gives me more power.
Im starting today my new restriction diet. I need to lose weight. Scared it will spiral out of control as always but I don't know what else to do. I miss my bones. I used to love counting them. Will have to keep this a secret as always...
I just feel horrible i gained 1kg ... Dont want to eat again i dont feel i deserve tht
@RedFennecFox
I understand completely how you feel....
@RedFennecFox - What would you say to a friend who said that to you? Would you feel they deserved to eat? What makes them different that you don't?
I think it's sometimes easy to be meaner to ourselves than we would EVER consider being to anyone else, and frankly, that's just not fair. You deserve to be treated more kindly by yourself. You deserve to take care of yourself. And you deserve to eat.
I feel awful...my heart doesn't want to slow down, I felt like I was going to pass out two times this morning, my mouth is dry, but hey, I lost another pound....
Even though I feel like I've seen improvement on the road to recovery, I still have a huge problem with my body image. I can still see my bones, but they're nowhere near as prominent as they use to. I still want to lose weight and be as thin as I can. I feel like even though my eating has gotten better, my body image has gotten worse. I can't go in public anymore without wearing a baggy hoody and a big T-shirt. It's pathetic
@openfire hey there, feeling insecure about our body image is a very common feeling among all people and there is nothing pathetic about it lovely, im so glad to read that your eating pattern has gotten better. This is really a big achievement! You have a lot of other good qualities to focus on it and to be proud about it and in time and love we can build a great body image for our selves... hugs
