Asking For Advice: Being Yourself
Hello, I am trying to break several habits of people pleasing and outright making myself unhappy just for the sake of validation. I grew up in a household where my family members weren't often there for me unless I did something they liked. My parents were quite strick and even mentioning you had an opinion that slightly deviated from them usually ended up in mockery and verbal "correction". Even now my mom reads every comment on my fb page and messages me when she thinks I did something "wrong". Since I still more or less live with them part of the year, is it worth going out of my way to express myself, or should I just keep quiet as always to make my life more peaceful? Its worth noting that I dont believe the people on Facebook are that interested in what I think either.
i have a similar situation with my parents. i have found to express myself in other ways but keep quiet around them to avoid arguments and keep a peaceful environment at home. i told myself it’s better to know where i stand myself than try to express it with them when they’re not ready to hear what i have to say or think.
I am happy to hear that you are trying to break several habits of people pleasing. You realize that the people pleasing contributes you some of your unhappiness. Also, it is nice to have validation. That's why it's good to surround yourself with supportive people where you feel that you can be yourself and express your opinions and be supported. Some people are really judgmental and bullying, like how you mention. I found that it isn't worth the time trying to get a point across to people that refuse to understand. Fimding the quiet has its advantages. It brings peace of mind. In my opinion, Facebook is not a really supportive place like this website. There are some people, pages and groups that are really great though.
