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fossilfellow profile picture
My dad had surgery today.
by fossilfellow
Last post
1 day ago
...See more My dad had angioplasty done few hours ago he had been feeling pain around his chest area and my elder sis took him to the doctor this morning. He'll be under observation for two days in the hospital. I hope everything will be okay 🙁💚
sonnieeee profile picture
On continuing to ignore family
by sonnieeee
Last post
3 days ago
...See more So lately, I have been rejecting a lot of "family" time because I don't like the drama and don't have the emotional capacity to deal with everything. I'm not trying to come off as bitter or anything, but my love life is not the best. My boyfriend is in a depression right now trying to avoid prison and focusing on managing his finances better so he can remain free but his family is making him feel down. My mom seems to have this view that "everything is perfect" but maybe it is to her but it isn't to me. Being with a partner who is dealing with their mental health while also battling your own is tough. My sisters are having children, I'm the only female that hasn't and I keep getting asked questions about when I am, but the reality is that I don't feel comfortable doing so until I have enough money because right now I'm living check to check and my boyfriend isn't in the financial position to take care of me and his child like that. I asked him about having a child next year and he said that wouldn't be bad, but I don't want to make a decision because it's what others are doing - I really want to make sure I'm in the headspace.  I really been avoiding a lot of family things because my siblings annoy me. Their happiness is almost as if I should be happy too and it's simply not the case. Again, I probably sound bitter, but right now in my life my focus isn't on a child - it's on getting through school so my boyfriend and I can be comfortable because right now we aren't. I really have been avoiding family gatherings - like last weekend my step sister had a baby shower and I didn't go. I don't know if my mom went or not but I'm tired of her too. My mom doesn't show up for me but she does everything for her husband and her marriage. She made a comment stating that she wasn't coming to visit me but she was going to be with my grandfather when she comes to my state - very hurtful seeing as though I moved and you still haven't came by to see my place.  Overall, I'm really just venting because I need to get things off of my chest and this is an emotion I deal with often - not trying to come across as bitter. I may just be bitter, but at this point if I am I really don't care because I have so much on my plate and I have to do things according to what is just and responsibly. 
PeggyMeghan111 profile picture
Family
by PeggyMeghan111
Last post
3 days ago
...See more My mum and my siblings are the one supposed to care for me but whenever I ask for help they are not able to support me
brightLake5661 profile picture
Family by blood but not from feeling
by brightLake5661
Last post
Tuesday
...See more Some pain doesn’t show on the outside, but it stays in the heart. In families, sibling jokes may seem normal, but sometimes they hurt when repeated again and again. You try to laugh, but inside it still feels heavy. When you speak up, you hear “It’s just a joke,” so you stay quiet and smile outside. The truth is, words from strangers don’t hurt as much… but words from your own family stay deep, because they are supposed to make you feel safe—not broken. This is all waht I experience in my life other say don't overact but tahts something taht hurt I cry alone my friends teacher outsider see smile on my face but that not real there is pain I carry but even my family can't understand
MysteriouslyFound1893 profile picture
Is it okay to want space from your family?
by MysteriouslyFound1893
Last post
Tuesday
...See more Is it okay if on most days I need space from my parents? Is it okay if on most days I just need the affection and acknowledgement? It is okay if on most days I want to just be away from this place, anywhere but here?
energeticGrapes7377 profile picture
Celebrating the good days
by energeticGrapes7377
Last post
August 8th
...See more Thank God life is a succession of moments. Yesterday was a hard day for mom and I. She learned she can't drive anymore and was very upset. I was the bad guy in her eyes even though it's not my fault her license had expired. She also didn't want to go to bed or take her meds. Today, on the other hand, things ran smoothly. I know it's probably because she had no reason to drive and therefore didn't remember she can't drive. But I'll still count it as a win. No arguments, a couple of laughter here and there. Life is good today💜
energeticGrapes7377 profile picture
Caregiver daughter with no support system in the same city
by energeticGrapes7377
Last post
August 7th
...See more My mom is on the early stages of dementia. She's 79yo going on 80 in December. I'm 47, single, no kids and living with her. We don't have much of a support system in the city. I have 3 siblings. Each one lives in a different city. The closest lives 6 hours drive away. We talk constantly, but just the close one is active in helping. I've been diagnosed with chronic depression and anxiety in my 20s and lately, as in the autism spectrum. I work at home (online job). My dad died of cancer 10 years ago. Even though I wasn't his first caregiver at the time (he was married with my stepmother who took most care of him) I was the only daughter around and took care of him every other day, took care of the funeral and all the burocracia afterwards. My mom is a sweet person, but she can be stubborn. She's always been an independent and Cary capable women. But facing her lost of independence has been tough on her. Last night we found out her driver's license is expired. She was already upset the doctors told her not to drive on the road. Now, knowing she can't drive at all, something she loves... It's really difficult. She sees me as the bad guy. I'm trying to take care of her. But even after reading and getting guidance on how to approach things I end up being impatient and speaking loud (I've always spoken like that, specially when anxious or nervous). I hate myself after prohibiting my mom from doing things like eating sweets, staying awake while I go to bed (she doesn't sleep if I don't send her to bed and feels dizzy on the other day), now driving. Plus, every time I see a big decline marker I'm transported to the day my dad died looking at me and holding my hand. The deep loneliness I felt, the sense of losing my home, my safe space that I had in him. I swear I'm trying. But mostly I feel like a failure. Sorry for the long post. I'm just venting. Thank you for anyone who reads this.
DavidT1914 profile picture
Difficult conversations
by DavidT1914
Last post
August 6th
...See more How do you deal with difficult conversations at home without choking up. It can be hard to express emotions in a sensitive space like with family. What helps you? You can message me if you feel like youd like to develop upon it
snugglyPomegranate9534 profile picture
Newbie
by snugglyPomegranate9534
Last post
August 6th
...See more Hi everyone, I recently joined 7cup, and I am really enjoying chatting to the listeners that get in touch.
CradleDuck profile picture
I feel damned if I do and damned if I don't.
by CradleDuck
Last post
August 3rd
...See more About a month ago, my sister was the victim of a serious hit-and-run. She suffered multiple brain injuries and other serious injuries. She spent time in the ICU and is currently in a rehabilitation hospital. Needless to say, my family has been under an incredible amount of stress ever since. As everything has unfolded, I've learned more about some of the decisions that were made afterward. The more I learn, the more conflicted I become. One of those decisions involved a fundraiser that was created to help my sister. I genuinely think it's a blessing that people are willing to help her. I have no issue with people wanting to support someone going through something this traumatic. Where I started struggling was when I learned who helped organize it. This wasn't just a random person. From what I learned, he has a criminal history involving sexual offenses against a child, and years ago he and my sister also had a previous sexual relationship that ended badly. Learning those things made me uncomfortable and left me with questions about how he ended up being involved. I asked those questions because I genuinely wanted to understand. I wasn't trying to criticize anyone or make the situation about me. I wasn't saying people shouldn't help my sister. Instead, I was basically told to let it go, stop asking questions, accept kindness when it's offered, and that I was making the situation about myself because I hadn't created the fundraiser or donated through it. From my perspective, that completely missed the point. My concern wasn't that someone helped. My concern was about trust and understanding how that decision was made. Now I honestly don't know what the right thing to do is. Part of me feels like she's my sister, so asking questions isn't unreasonable. Another part of me feels like my family has always been dysfunctional, everyone is emotionally exhausted, and continuing to push this will only create more conflict. At this point, I'm honestly leaning toward letting it go—not because my concerns disappeared, but because I'm not convinced saying more will help anyone. If you were in my position, what would you do? Would you speak up or let it go, and why?
neatKite8306 profile picture
Considering going no-contact with my family
by neatKite8306
Last post
August 3rd
...See more I’m really considering going no contact with my family and trying to decide if it’s the right step. There’s been a long pattern of my boundaries not being respected, especially around politics, religion, and mental health. I’ve asked multiple times for those topics to be off-limits just while I'm around, but they still come up regularly. These conversations often include racist/sexist or inflammatory comments, and I end up either staying silent, leaving the room, or disengaging. They know how I feel, but it doesn't feel right to start an argument at my parents' house. They also consistently dismiss or minimize my mental health. The lack of understanding (or even trying to understand) has taken a real toll over time. Even when I’ve tried to communicate how much that impacts me, it hasn’t really changed. At this point, all contact mostly leaves me emotionally drained and anxious, and I’ve started avoiding it or wishing for more distance. One example that stands out is a family conflict where I was the only one defending a sibling against our cousins. My concerns were ignored, the situation escalated, and I ended up receiving such hateful comments without any real apology or support from my family. This dynamic where I’m only heard or respected if I fully align with them has repeated over the last few years in different forms. So basically, I'm trying to decide if I should go no contact with my parents and my siblings. I have five siblings, and some are more like my parents than others. I'd appreciate any suggestions, advice, or whatever about this, even if you think I'm overreacting. For those who’ve gone no contact, what made it clear for you that it was time? How did you do it? Just randomly stop talking? Did you let them know first?
RashellLena24 profile picture
Is always DAD
by RashellLena24
Last post
July 28th
...See more I don't know how to deal with my father anymore. We were on the road heading home when he and my mother started arguing—he was the one who started it. Things began to escalate; at one point, my mother checked her phone because of a work message, and he lashed out at her for looking at it. She tried to calm him down, but everything just got worse; he started hitting the steering wheel and yelling at her—he had never been that violent before. My mother has always been calm, but in that moment, she told him, "This is the last time you raise your voice at me. Do you understand?" He kept shouting and started speeding up the car. I tried to calm things down, but he wouldn't listen to me, so I went silent and tried not to make a sound. He asked me why I always act that way, and I told him I felt like the problem because every time I spoke, it ended in an argument (I had only mentioned wanting to go to Japan someday; he started talking about money, and suddenly the conversation veered off track and it all kicked off). He started playing the victim, and I just wanted to get out of the car. It all happened so fast—we got home, I got out, and now I'm locked in my room again. I took all the pills I have and the last shots of my Jack D, thinking about a blade. I really want to leave home, but I have nowhere to go; I honestly don't know what to do.

Family & Caregivers


Welcome to Family & Caregivers! This is a supportive space to share your thoughts and experiences.

“The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other,”  Richard Bach.

 

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Community Space: A place for introductions, icebreakers, games, community check-ins and discussions.

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Guidelines Specific to Family Support Community

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2) Please use appropriate language for all ages - This community supports both teens and adults.  Curse/cuss words will be removed from posts.  

3) Some topics may be triggering - If you find a topic here triggering please step away and take a moment of self-care. We try to be inclusive and discuss a wide variety of topics so there will be something for everyone.

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