Mom vs Friend
I’m 36 and my mom still wants to be a part of everything I do. A friends husband invited her to a party in two weeks, not knowing my mommy issues but I really don’t want her there. She makes things awkward for me, I’m the only one in my friends group who’s mom tags along. Tonight at Halloween, she tagged along to watch my kids trick or treat but then hangs out afterwards. She has nothing to contribute to the convo bc we are in a different stage of life, so she brings up her aging her Dad and brings down the mood and makes it awkward. How do I tell her, without hurting her, that I don’t want her and my Dad to come to the party?
There’s a long history of her expecting me to fill her friendship void. I’ve told her multiple times that she needs to make friends her own age. She wants to be my friend and I just want her to be my mom and a grandmother to my kids. She doesn’t respect my boundaries and gets offended or makes me feel guilty when I do things and she’s not included. I’m at my wits end, I now have anxiety about the party that I was really looking forward too.
@labmom2 Maybe ask her not to go to the party, but offer to do something special with her, just you and your mom. Tell her, the last thing you want to do is hurt her, but you need your own social life. Does your father understand this at all? Can he help back you up on this?