Toddler tantrums with dad
Hi all,
Im looking for some advice in supporting my husband with his relationship with our son. In turn, this would help me (the wife and mom) get a freaking break! I am exhausted from essentially being a solo parent in a two parent home.
My husband has been struggling to find his stride in parenting. Our son will soon be 3 and has really started acting out. He hits and yells and generally creates chaos. He generally acts this way when he is tired and when his dad is around. He yells at him to leave him alone and hits him. I don't know why this has started but I suspect it is because husband constantly nags at him. He always seems negative and never makes time to play.
My husband is very closed off lately and, although I know this is not what he wants, just keeps pushing us away. He doesn't want to talk to me and certainly isn't making an effort to improve things.
Help!
@intuitiveOwl8571
That does sound very frustrating, and I've sort of been in your shoes. We are not therapists and cannot give advice, but it does seem that your little one is sending a message. It's hard to tell what's causing it, and it would be dangerous to even share ideas since there could be lots of reasons and lots of varying opinions on what is or is not appropriate based on your country of origin, culture or even your personal upbringing. I can say that my husband and I had way different ideas about parenting. In the end, we sought the advice of our pediatrician and, later, a family therapist, and it made a huge difference. I'm happy to say that I have 3 well-mannered, successful adults now, and the lessons I learned while they were young could fill a book!
@intuitiveOwl8571 I am sorry you are having trouble with your family. I highly recommend following Mr. Chazz on social media. He is a pre-school teacher. He has a lot of content about tantrums and co-regulation. Some suggestions I saw were having a "calm corner" for the height of the tantrum or just hugging, breathing with them during tantrums and trying to talk/listen after they have calmed down more.