Issues with my father
My father and I had an extremely difficult relationship from my childhood because he had hoped for a baby boy and I unfortunately for him came out as a baby girl. Our relationship had gone its ups and downs but currently its hit an all time low. I am a part of a joint family where the divisions havent been fair to us. So he has completely lost his *** and is making terrible financial decisions. It seems as tho he is in self destruction mode and when i beg him to take wise actions he like a child sells off more stuff. He told me that he would love to watch me struggle. I am currently financially dependent on him but i feel extremely stuck because i don’t know the man nor do i trust him. With no financial security and constant uncertainty of living with a narcissist i have been feeling lot of anxiety and self harm issues. I feel stuck.
@Tobelawyer05 🙁 I'm sorry sweetie 🙁 this must be a very difficult position to be put into. Let's hope and pray he comes to his senses before everything is lost. Is there a friend or family member he trusts? Maybe you can reach out to them for help. I'm not sure what to say to comfort you best, sorry 😕 but my arms are always open ready to hug you 💗 hugs you tightly 💖 I'll keep you in my prayers 💖
Thank you for your message❤️
I am so sorry to hear these🥲🥲But I truly understand your frustration because this had happened a lot in my country in the past and unfortunately still happening today...
Do you have anyone around you to support you especially you have demonstrated behaviour like self harm which I feel really sorry for😭It's hard that you're financially dependent (but soon when you grow up you will be free)
I know you must've been through a lot and I hope you have hobbies that may help you to relax and stuff (I recommend writing down your thoughts just like what you are doing right now cuz it really helps)
And please know that it's not your fault there's just a lot of things we can't control 😭You deserve to be loved and cared! Feel free to message me anytime if you feel upset. I also believe that although you're not meant to suffer these, you will be a strong girl (stronger than a lot of the people) after surviving all the challenges
Babe I wish the best for you. I hope things will get better
Hi - thank you so much for your message❤️
Yes, this is a difficult and challenging situation, it feels horrible to feel stuck, especially with a parent. However, sometimes we aren't able to differentiate between whether we are the taker or the giver, so in this case if you really think about it, being financially dependant automatically makes you the taker, like you're just taking what dad gives you and accepting it, however, sometimes you have to give something back. I'm not not talking about money or finances, just any kind of love, it could be offering a cup of tea, or even a glass of water, it could be a fun conversation that could lead to a laugh, it could be anything, but a sign of love that, what they're doing really matters. You know? As parents, it is common to get frustrated, specially when you have children. It is simple to point out fingers, but we have to observe our own actions first. If you are going to be sad and numb in front of him most of the time, he is going to behave the way he is, as he needs emotional support too, or he needs to feel respected at least. I hope I was clear.
I’m so sorry it’s so hard having a parent who only looks out for themselves instead of their kid, like they should be. My mom is like that, she never apologizes, shifts blame on me always, won’t give me the time of day, or if she does, it’s rare. It’s freaking degrading my self esteem. I’m here ❤️
Sorry that you are going through this as well! Thank you so much for reaching out - please know that i am also here for you❤️
@Tobelawyer05 I am so sorry you are going through this. You are not alone alone in this and I hope for the best for you.
