Constantly losing friends
I think I'm starting to wake up and realize that I'm not all too great of a person. I lost an entire friend group this year and losing one of the people who was my friend even through the toughest times has really killed me on the inside. I'm not sure what to do or even where to go from here. I just feel lost, I know I'm not an awful person but my actions seem to not reflect that...
@CrazyBranch333 it sucks losing friends specially the good ones ... if you'd like to share.. what lead them to leave you? is it something you feel you wanna try making any amends for?
Basically my own behavior and my own issues with my self coming out and making them eventually leave. Such as treating them badly or an acquaintance badly l
@CrazyBranch333 you acknowledge your bad behavior and understand how it would have lead them to leave you , that's brave of you 💛
where do you think these behaviors come from? anything triggered you to act in a certain way? Or made you lose calm?
I think they stem from a lot of childhood abuse plus isolation which made me learn things at a different pace and also gave me emotional issues
@CrazyBranch333 right something that wasn't in your control ever ... so are you really to blame yourself for any of it? Or do you even deserve to be left alone by your friends when you actually need them to be with you and least be understanding and supportive? yeah?
they better be friends for a reason ... how do you feel about trying to talk to them about your struggles? that despite your best efforts you slip up with certain behaviours at times and it's valid for them to feel upset or whatever they do too but you too deserve to feel heard atleast and be provided some space while you're dealing with your challenges 💕
a good friend is not someone we always giggle with or watch movies with ... a good friend is also someone who accepts us and loves us even when we aren't much lovable....who cares for us ... looks beyond the overt actions and behaviors... takes time to understand and make us feel understood ... not guilty or ashamed for being who we are or having our own set of challenges :) honestly? you deserve all of this too ... feeling accepted, cared for, understood and loved! Don't settle for less 😕
Absolutely love what you said abou what a * Good friend* is. I needed to hear this too. Hits home for me emotionally cause I need this in my life since I haven't had much on my life right. ❤❤❤❤❤
I need this too!!!
Hopeto make so many of these as well. ❤❤❤❤
I totally understand how you feel about this!!
I have been through this and currently still experiencing this myself. I lost a really close friend 3 yrs ago before the Pandemic began and I lost her and all her families plus all the other friends joined along in our circle. ❤❤❤❤❤
I feel your pain and tears and sadness and suffering its HUGE! you're not alone im going through this. Its so hard to go through life without having your tribe but I do have faith that you and I both will make new connections of friends and other relationships as well.
The best way to describe how the pain and grief feels like like it's like having the air knocked out of you and your heart is cut into pieces and can't breathe. ❤❤❤❤
I'm so sorry you're going through this too. No one showed ever go through it.
I do know that you and I both are worth love and people to connect with and everlasting bonds and relationships. We're good people that deserves all the love and happiness the world has to offer. One day at the time one moment to moment one breathe at a time. Much love to you. Your feelings are valid and important! Your important!! We both are important!!!!
awww thankyou 🥺 I'm glad it helped you too 💕 hope you find many awesome friends like this also ❣ you deserve them too 🤗 @Leanna3333
Totally agree with you! Yes I do!! I'm finding it quite difficult now a days. It definitely isn't impossible. I mean I've had people in my life like this many times before in the past so I know what it feels like to have people on my life who are *Good Friends/ family relationships. It feels absolutely amazing to have such deep connections and relationships. ❤❤❤❤❤❤
I've made a few connections recently but those people have already left a few weeks ago so I'm back at square one putting myself out there again feels terrible putting your heart out to people and you just start feeling like its going really well and feels good they leave you cause they're not into making the relationship work cause they want different things then you
@CrazyBranch333
Don’t give up on yourself. You might have behaved poorly in the past and there’s always consequences to our actions. You’re not proud of it and suffering for it, but it’s not too late to change! The future isn’t set in stone. You can still decide the person that you want to be tomorrow.
This introspective journey you’re on right now is very healthy for you. As long as you take responsibility for the situation, and recognize the things you could have done better and differently. At the same time, don’t just punish yourself mercilessly! You mentioned in a response above that there was abuse and trauma in the past. Someone, somewhere at some time in the past failed to teach you how to love and express yourself effectively. They showed you a corrupted message of what the world is, and might have caused you to internalize fear and doubt instead of love and acceptance. Of course if fear and doubt drives us the destination is always isolation!
But you are not your fear. You are not your trauma. You are not your bad decisions and mistakes. Who you were in the past is not who you will always be tomorrow or the next day! The past is not your destiny. Forgive yourself. There is someone inside of you that needs love, that deserves love. You deserve love! You deserve friends that support you. And they will come. In your lifetime there will be opportunities to meet new people, to forge new bonds and share new experiences. Embrace these opportunities! Open your heart to love and acceptance. Every day is a new day, to do better, to be better. To change your future, it might start with a single courageous thought!
Wishing you all the best during this difficult time.
CatsInTheCradle
@CrazyBranch333
sounds like you are growing up. :)
Hey I can totally relate with you. Similar things have happened to me and they keep happening to me. But it's not your fault at all. Don't ever think that you're a bad person or anything like that. It's just that people don't value the goodness /kindness they see or find in people. And they don't even think twice before easily loosing them. It's okay.. they are loosing YOU. You aren't loosing THEM.
Sometimes I also keep wondering what is happening with me and why and it definitely makes me sad to think that I have don't really have anyone whom I can call my friend as such. And yes, i recently felt like I got betrayed by someone who i used to think would become my life long friend. I don't understand why people are the way are... They use you and then they just change or behave differently one fine day and it just seems like things are over between us.
Please remember that you're not an awful person okay. I'm sending you lots of positive and good vibes to attract good people in your life :)
@starsnights
Perfectly said! I totally agree with you!! This is very helpful to too. 💕💕💕💕
Hey, sorry to hear about your friends. I’m glad that you know that you’re not that great of a person, that way you can find ways to improve yourself. I hope that you have a good year ahead and that you can work to be a better person that you can love. :)
