Truma made my friends bail.
Hello everyone.
I have talked about my truma in another community forum but today I wanted to talk about my friends who 180, blocked me, or kicked me out the group servers I was in.
To give context, (trigger warning of talk of suicide)
5 months ago, I was abused, catfished by a person who accused me of being a pedo. Cops came and I was fortunate enough that I'm not in legal trouble. To be honest I wanted to comment suicide on that day but I talked myself out of it.
A few months later, someone from dis cord shared that video with a mod. After a lengthy talk, I was banned. Soon later... my friends apparently saw the video... it was so convincing n my own voice was clear as day. During that day, I was fight or flight mode through out the whole ordeal. I was scared n I could not do anything... so some people stayed n some 180 me. It been 2 months since that happened and it hurts me so much. 2 blocked me, majority of them have not even asked me what happened, and that I did tell... still 180... God I just feel I would disappear from everyone but the people who still care about me I want to be with them. I took down that video but the damage is done. *cries* I don't know why I'm anger but still care about them... I wonder if they would care if I was gone or see me getting help... just seems to them I'm a problem
@Vivikun9 hey
@royalMoment3213
Hello
@Vivikun9
Dude we're legit the same :P
I've been through alot of internet drama in which people made me out to be the bad guy/an immature drama queen, which still haunts me months later, so I relate to you on that :P Sadly though, I don't have the luxury of saying I'm completely innocent. They were partially caused by toxic ['immature'] behaviors on my end, although I know I hadn't been trying to be a bad person. The whole time I'd been trying to be good :P
@Zevia1MM
Please note however, that I'm not saying my experience with people calling me manipulative/immature is as severe as what you went through, although the emotional impact is the same.
@Zevia1MM
Different experiences but same feelings. I can understand that feeling. Even if the actions are different the outcome is the same feeling.
@Vivikun9
Mhm, yeah :P