What to Do if a Friend Ghosts You

“With ghosting, we know that there are four fundamental needs that get threatened,” explained Gili Freedman, an assistant professor of psychology at St. Mary’s College of Maryland: “Your sense of belonging, your sense of meaningful existence — that you have a place in the world, and that place is meaningful — your sense of control and your self-esteem.”

Validate your experience — and your pain

There is “a certain shame” to being ghosted by a friend. Much of it stems from the mythology that you’re supposed to keep your friends for all eternity, when in fact research in the Netherlands suggests people may lose about half of the friends in their social network every seven years.

Simply reminding yourself that fluidity is a hallmark of friendship and that platonic ghosting is relatively widespread can offer some comfort, because it helps normalize the experience.

Research suggests simply naming feelings without trying to change them or push them away — a technique known as “affect labeling” — can offer solace.

Reclaim some control and a sense of connection

Focus your time and attention on areas of your life where you feel a sense of agency. Is that at work? Through certain hobbies? Pour your energy into those pursuits.

At the same time, although being ghosted feels deeply personal, it may help to remind yourself that getting dumped may have nothing to do with you. For instance, that your friend might be grappling with mental health issues, an illness or family problems, and they may not be ready to share — even with a very good friend."

Read the full article on The New York Times

✨Takeaway: It's important to remember that the end of a friendship doesn't necessarily reflect on our worth as a person. People may "ghost" a friendship for a variety of reasons, including their own issues and struggles, changes in their life circumstances, or simply drifting apart.

✨Reflection: Have you ever experienced friendship ghosting in your own life? How did it make you feel?

#Relationships #Friendships #Ghosting #MentalHealth

If you liked this article, you may also enjoy: "7 Ways To Cope When Adult Friendships End And Move On"