Backup friend Pt#2
Hey so last time I was on here I talked about my friend raspberry (fake name) yeah well we were suppose to handout this weekend and she told me she was sick for the past 2 days, still is apparently and that’s why I can’t hangout with her. Well according to her *** and her telling me she isn’t home rn, she’s at orange’s house. (Another fake name) she’s totally replacing me after everything I’ve done for her. I drop everything for her. And she’s been pushing me away and tells me to my face she wants to hangout with me and she’s tired of her mama telling her to be nice to me since I use to be so close to them we were like family and it just feels like she only wants to hangout with me cause either orange can’t or her mama makes her.
I don’t really feel like anyone likes me other than my bf, I mean I have a group of friends at school but they all leave me behind and ignore me all the time, one doesn’t respect my boundaries because I hate when my food is touched or people chewing with their mouth open, talking with mouth full, etc and she still does, THEN gets pissy at me cause I’m making her feel disgusting?! I can’t do spit or vomit or anything of the sorts I get grossed out to the point my body physically tweaks out and I start having cold chill like twitching.
Maybe I’m delulu? Crazy?
-xoxo shay
@ShayWaddell08 i get u how u feel, but y'know u have to move on, they never meant for u
@ShayWaddell08
Its great that you recognise your triggers - your food being touched, people eating with their mouth open etc.
And it's understandable that to start with, you want friends to help you manage those triggers, by avoiding them.
But is it realistic to expect friends to always do this? After all they have their own lives to live and own triggers to manage.
Maybe it's time to start thinking about managing your own triggers and respecting your own boundaries? Why for example, do you choose to keep sitting with someone who triggers you?
Maybe it's because you value the friendship more than the discomfort of the trigger? In which case, can you value them enough to do them the honour of accepting them as they are? Or is your love for them conditional on them being how you think they should be, rather than how they wish to be?