I don't know if I have ruined everything

Recently I have a huge argument with my friend. She said that she wanted to make peace with me, and that we should let time pass and we could talk one day. She even said "see you in a while."

However, I found that she has blocked me on all platforms. I couldn't reach out to her so I had to wait for her to take the initiative to reconcile. This isn't the first time she does this. She did block me after our first argument for a week to cool things down.

But this is our third argument now, and it is the worst one. She felt wronged by my actions of throwing away all my support to her and her creative work based on a false pretense (I suddenly got triggered at that moment and I lashed out. I also have been dealing with tons of emotional distress recently but it's not an excuse to be a horrible person).

She is aware that I have gone through tons of trauma, usually involving people close to me betraying or abandoning me. She constantly told me that she is not like them, but I constantly struggled to accept it. She was sad that her words couldn't get into my head, and that my insecurities and trauma had made me perceived everyone as monsters. She also constantly told me to stop assuming everything and to have hope in people, believing that they do care about me.

Now I wonder if I should trust her for keeping her promise to reconcile with me, or should I think otherwise? Because I felt that I had ruined everything and it's all my fault.