I need new friends (?)
I think I need a whole new friend group. I'm finally figuring things out within myself and my connection to the Lord, but the more I do so, the more I realize how much effort I put into my friends. Too much effort. I was always really eager to make friends when I was a kid, but I didnt actually get any until highschool. But I fear that bc of that, I prioritize them in a way thats destructive or leaves me disappointed with myself. Now I find myself doing or saying more in hopes that I get a reaction, or just hoping that something goes wrong in order to reveal how much I matter to them.
I recognized that I started doing this a while ago, but its started to make me bitter towards them. It feels like Im the only one that stays up until 2am helping them with their boy problems, or im the only one that circles back to conversations that were just glossed over. Just the other day, I tried asking one of the GCs for hard advice and I was met with one word answers. It's so frustrating, but I know im acting entitled to something that they're not obligated to give. They dont have to give me their time. I acknowledge this, but it still makes me wanna post something cryptic, delete all socials, and just go dark in hopes anyone would reach out.
Something more that makes me wonder is the fact that now I feel almost embarrassed to hang out with them. We finally made it out of the GC, but the second I ran into people I knew, I felt ashamed. And then when we got into an argument earlier, they were messy and started more drama with a girl that none of us even know. When that happened, it was like the things I had been ignoring had suddenly come to light. If they were so willing to bash someone else behind their back, how could I be sure they weren't doing it to me? Even when I try to nip confrontation in the bud, how much still unfolds behind the scenes?
I really love them. I do. I put them on such a high pedestal that I forgot they're human. But its so hard to even think about distancing myself from them because I know I'd be alone. I know they'd talk about me, and I'd have to go back to how I was b4. Not to mention, now I know they're bad influences. Im not sure if I want to be surrounded by people who like to start drama (amid the many other things they do) nor if I have the energy to try and show them the actions they should take instead.
Im exasperated. What do I do??
Thank you for sharing what you are going thru @ultravioletInfrared8 ✨🙏🏽✨
I would like to start by kindly suggesting that you bring back to yourself all that energy that you are putting in this “circle of friends”
You have a big heart and you really care. You are aware of yourself and that is so important✨ However, people do not react the same way unfortunately…
What if you post something cryptic, put your social networks on pause and “disappear for a while”? You go back to yourself, to your needs, to what you want… Maybe you start a new hobby, a new class, a new walk or exercise and you go back to be your happy self 😊
You vibe will attract your tribe ✨ and the people that have to stay will stay. Along the way, we meet people for a reason, a season or a life time - enjoy and learn from all of them!
You have a friend in me✨
Sending you lots of good vibes💫
I know it's true that friendships are a big part of our lives. They really do influence us deeply. But you know that saying, “It’s better to be alone than in bad company”? That quote is so real—it took me years to truly understand it. I didn’t really get it until life hit me hard and I saw the truth for myself: that phrase is worth gold.
Yes, being alone hurts. It’s not easy at all. But it’s still better than being surrounded by people who don’t care about you, who treat you like you’re just another person—not a friend, not someone they value, just… someone who’s there. That’s more painful than solitude.
So honestly, the best thing you can do right now is choose to be alone, even if it stings. Because with time, you’ll start to attract the kind of people who do get you. People who connect with your thoughts, your soul, your energy. The right ones.
But if you keep staying around people who mistreat you or don’t value you, then the ones who would really connect with you might walk away, because they’ll think you’re just like the ones you're with.
So take that step—even if it’s scary—and protect your peace. The right people will come.
If you ever feel like you need someone to talk to, I’m here. Seriously, don’t hesitate to message me privately—I’d be more than happy to support you.❤️🩹
Im really sorry to hear that. I know its not easy always second guessing and that feeling of not wanting to be alone is hard. Its normal to want to make connections with people and to impress them. However, if you feel like you have to always be outgoing and put on a show just for them to notice you then it may become too much down the line. Ive just made it out of 8th grade so I cant say much about what its like in high school but my best advice that I can give is to just try new things. If there are any clubs you are interested in or even if you just try sitting at a different place during lunch every day you could meet some new people. If you ever want someone to talk to then I’m always here. I hope you have a great day or night ^^
