Narcissistic Mother

@lavenderBlueberry665

Not necessarily having a narcissist mother, but i noticed a narcissist bully and they ruined things, events, etc. They cause extreme anxiety, and the world would be better off without the narcissist. 

There's some sources on how to deal with a narcissist mother, I copy some below

• Implement Boundaries Firmly

• Minimize Communication

One of the most effective ways to protect yourself from a narcissistic mother’s negative influence is to limit engagement with her. 

• Stay Calm

When she realizes her efforts to bait you are unsuccessful, she may give up and seek another source for her narcissistic supply.

• Consider No-Contact

In some cases, taking a no-contact approach with a narcissistic mother may be the best decision. No contact is exactly what it sounds like–you eliminate all forms of communication with your mother. 

• Do not let her manipulate you

-you no longer are subject to her moods or required to meet her expectations. Take back the power she held over you 

• Practice Grey Rocking

Many people embrace the “grey rock method” to avoid narcissistic abuse. This method can be effective if you have to maintain some form of contact with your mother. The grey rock method essentially refers to disengaging from the narcissistic person. Make a conscious effort to act uninterested, bored, or unresponsive when communicating with your narcissistic mother. You might respond with one-word answers or ignore them instead of picking arguments.

Thank you, those are very helpful. I've distanced myself from her. It just hurts, I'm grieving for the mother I wish I had.

@lavenderBlueberry665

I’ll gladly talk about my mother. However she’s not narcissistic. She’s toxic and abusive in non physical ways with narcissism being one of her many shall we say qualities or whatever you wanna call them that she displays daily. 

PS: After being married to and living with her for as long as he has my stepdad is becoming more and more like her. He’s already got the toxic and non physically abusive parts down and clearly working on the rest. They’re so similar despite fighting with each other all the time. 

Hey,

Thanks for posting it is brave to reach out and find out other people's views and opinions.

I think my mother is narcissistic, we have a very poor relationship at the moment. Growing up there were always expectations put on me and even if I did achieve them, was made to feel like it still wasn't good enough. I feel like it has had a negative impact on how I interact with people irl and also how I am in relationships. It's a challenge.

What experiences have you had? Are you feeling something in particular is a challenge?

Try not to let others define you.

Take it easy.

Nickel

I'm glad you are talking to folks bout this BC it can hurt to stuff your feelings stuffing anger creates depression too. My father was abusive to us so I can relate. I had to find mother substitutes BC my mom died when I was 14 and my dad did not want to parent, he was an alcoholic. So I found three church ladies who prayed for me taught me how to be a mother to my kids . I love Barb , Gayle and Doris They are wonderful I hope you can find someone too look up too and emulate You deserve to be loved You are an adult now you can choose your friends and support network. Bless you💟

@lavenderBlueberry665 Hey Blueberry. I have a narcissistic father who is also an alcoholic.  He can be very toxic and drains your energy like a vampire.

I think I might have one but I could be wrong. All I know is that sometimes when she mentions that I am not doing something correctly in her way, she acts very condescending like it’s always my fault and we end up arguing with each other. She acts like everything is never her fault and that she treats me like a bad person every time we have these arguments