ROCD?
Does anyone else struggle with relationship OCD but with friends? I feel like mine is really affecting me and the ones I love. I’m finding that I seem to be having a hard time maintaining my friendships because my loneliness and insecurities start to come out. Something that two different people have said to me: “I feel like I can never say the right thing” but idk how to word it to make it easier for them to understand either. I feel like I end up word vomiting
@raveneyes94
Here's some thoughts that may or may not help you.
Listening is a complex skill, that is rarely taught. Most people don't have all the skills involved in good listening. Its therefore worth expecting to have to repeat yourself in several different ways before you will be heard. Expecting it to happen first time normally results in disappointment and frustration. Save yourself the stress by having realistic expectations.
Learning to accept and validate our own feelings allows us to be confident in them and better able to express them. Feelings are not good or bad, they just are. But unfortunately, many are taught to be ashamed of certain feelings and when that has happened, will need to work to accept them.
When we are not confident in ourselves or our feelings, we tend to feel a need to justify them. If there are lots of words and explanations, it can be useful to ask ourselves: do we feel the need to justify either our actions or the feelings behind them? And to whom are we justifying them? I found that I was nearly always trying to justify mysrlf to myself, through friends and family. As I learnt to believe and trust in myself, this became less.
These are things that helped me. They might or might not be useful to you, but I hope you find what brings you peace.
