Anxious story teller

I am divorced but 30 i am sacred my heart will break again but i enjoy being a relationship my mind and body craves it I love being alone but i enjoy company more. I met a guy my office colleague....i like him, i think he likes me too, we hung out i enjoyed his company, not sure if he enjoyed my company after yesterday. I hope he tries for me...maybe i am worth it my ex told me i am an emotional abuser. I know for sure i am not one. I want to be in love again, for once i want a guy who tries for me, loves me values me, treats me right and marries me again, i will make a good companion and wife i think.

He hasn't texted me since yesterday it's killing me with anxiety. I know it's wrong, there are many guys, but what I have made a fool of myself and they gossip. It's my office.....i don't think i should be infatuated towards someone in office cause they office life gets *** but who can control the heart. So many people find their wife in office I want to find an husband is that wrong.

This field has Beena constant failure for me every relationship has broken my heart i am been dumped always. Maybe i am doomed...i feel so loney, i couldn't even find someone to talk about this. I need a therapist but i am constantly broke lol....