Any tips on how to let go of resentment?
Do you have any tips on how to let go of resentment? I've been neglected about 2 decades by my parents and i hold a lot of resentment towards them. I don't want to forgive them but i want to let go of the pain and the frustration i have. They hurt me a lot and for a long time i wanted to get my revenge. Now i just want to be at peace with their neglect and them and move on with my life. I found some pretty amazing you tubers that helped me a lot to kick start the process but i still have this bit of resentment. The hardest part for me is to acknowledge my messed up past and the fact that everything could have been different but, why am i mad over something that doesn't even exist. Yes i could have had a different and much happier childhood, but it wasn't the case. As simple and hurtful as that. So yeah, i just wanna move on and live life for myself. I'm done of them keeping to have an influence on me. Because if i have resentment and get mad at them they still have power over me. I wanna let go of it. Though the things the did are absolutely not ok, but it's going to be best for myself to move on. I've been abused way too much to still be hurting because of these very very bad people. And if you have any recommendations of other you tubers please share!
I don't mean to kill your hope but I think the hole created by childhood neglect and abuse is very hard to fill. I am sorry to have said this.
@schrodingerscattt i also hold resentment towards my dad. both my biologal dad and my step dad who raised me.
the only way to let go of resentment though IS forgiveness. covering it up with good times resolves nothing babe. you got this, you dont have to forgive them today, tomorrow, but sit down and talk with them. say "there will be no yelling, screaming or whatever" and jut tell them stuff
@EmmyMarie06
I don't agree with you. Forgiveness is not necessary. I can let go of resentment without forgiving it. Why would i forgive abuse? What happened was bad, and i will, by no mean, forgive it. You DON'T HAVE TO forgive anything. It puts even more pressure on trauma survivors. Some people, really struggle and go through horrible things so thinking that forgiveness is necessary is completely wrong. And where did i say i want to cover something up? I want to grow as a person and focus on my life and myself, because i'm the most important person in my life. It's not about covering up anything but creating a better life for myself and move on, and becoming the best version of myself.
@schrodingerscattt ok i didnt understand the circumstances. but even then PERSONALLY i would forgive them. i would never tell that to them though. im sorry you went through that, and i hope you do find a point where it rests easy in your soul.
@schrodingerscattt also i know just as well as anyone else that people go through stuff. ive been through unimaginable abuese, which i have forgiven my bio dad for. ive been through trauma yet here i am, ive forgiven them personally through living life you cant truely let go of resentment until you forgive. no matter what that looks like for you
@schrodingerscattt
As a very good friend once told me, when we hold onto resentments, we are “re-sensing it” over and over and never fully letting go. It holds us back and in the same place so we can’t move forward.
Personally, I still have a few resentments I am trying to let go of as well. I try to remember that the past is in the past, what’s done is done and nothing can change it. We all make mistakes. We can be our own worst critic sometimes. It’s okay to make mistakes, we just have to realize that our past and things that we have done that we don’t necessarily like, don’t define our future as long as we don’t let it.
If it’s something someone else has done to you, there isn’t anything you can do to change their actions. But we can forgive them for ourselves and move forward. Forgiving them doesn’t absolve them of guilt or make any of what they did okay. All it does, is allow you to move forward with a peaceful life. Sometimes, to be able to do that, we have to cut people out of our lives. I was abused by my mom, and constantly lied to and ignored. I held onto a lot of resentment towards her for eventually abandoning me and then coming back 16 years later like nothing happened. For me to move forward like I have, I had to let her go. It’s not an easy process to forgive someone for years of abuse. But it is possible. Just know that it wasn’t your fault. You are perfect the way you are! It’s going to take time and a lot of work, but you’ve got this! 💪💕
I don’t know if any of this helps, but I hope it did! If you ever need anything, you’re welcome to message me ♥️
Much love,
Kayla 💛✨
