Everything Changed the Day You Left.

I can’t wrap my head around the fact that you’re gone. Every time I let myself sit still, it comes crashing over me again you’re not here. You’re never coming back. I’ll never get to see your face, hear your laugh, or hold onto you again. The thought of living the rest of my life without you feels unbearable.

I keep thinking about all the moments you’ll miss you’ll never see me get married, never meet my kids, never be there for all the milestones I always imagined you would. And it rips me apart because those are the things I wanted to share with you most.

You told me not to be sad, that you didn’t want anyone to carry that kind of pain. But how could I not be? How could I just accept this? Every instinct in me still wants to call you, to show up at your door, to sit down with you like nothing has changed. But everything has changed, and I hate it.

I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to keep going without you here. I feel so lost, like a part of me was burned away with you. Your whole life your laugh, your voice, your presence reduced to ashes in an urn. And somehow, I’m supposed to go on carrying only memories when I just want you back.