Hi, "I don't know why I'm here."
Sometimes, I feel like I'm under water trying to screem while people ignore me or maybe I begun to ignore them. So I lock all that inside and just smile, and pretend it isn't there.
@NickHalfDime01
When we are feeling so horribly low, we want help and to speak out but because we are ultimately pretending it's ok, we say nothing and we get worse. It's easier than admitting it out loud. You dont need to suffer alone here 💜💕
Thanks
@NickHalfDime01
You are most welcome 🥰
@NickHalfDime01
I wonder the same thing Nick. I don’t know if I’ll ever feel normal and it scares me. I guess I’m here hoping to find someone somewhat similar to me. I think it’s good u are at least trying something new. Hopefully both of us get something out of this site! 🙏🏻
Playing guitar was always my stress reliever but after an event that happened to me my suppressed childhood trauma came rushing back.. I had to have some to talk to.
I put my fake face on regularly too. I have many fake faces for many situations...even right now in my marriage in the beginning stages of potentially improving...i definitely have to wear my fake face and pretend mostly for now.
Nick, in my line of work I always had to respond to "how are you?" with... " Great!" Even tho it wasn't the truth... So to say I get it is an understatement.. but to get things off your mind or to at least ease it, it's OKAY to vent it's okay to cry it's okay say how you feel... There's no judgement here and we all care so much about everyone so please don't hesitate to say whatever you need to, so you can ease your thoughts....
We see you Nick ❤️☀️🌞
When I was 6 I was the kid in school that everyone bullied because I would count my steps, an at home every night I could here my parents fighting, one night my dad almost killd my mom, after that they divorced my dad remarried and my step mom hated me she would tell me everyday that I was worthless and wouldn't amount to anything and after awhile I believe, she would come in my room to give me pills that I started hiding under my bed I even had thoughts of suicid my sister saved me from that.. I developed social anxiety from it I guess you can say... will skipping ahead Im 33 now I wrote a fictional story to express myself and to feel worthy well my girlfriend wouldn't acknowledge it.. Days later I blackout and everything that I blocked out had came back I stopped eating and sleeping... But after coming here I had found a friend to talk to that understands.
I'm so sorry you had to go thro that nick
Yeah...