I wrote about myself from the perspective of a concerned friend

It was interesting and let me distance myself from what I was saying about myself. I think you should give it a try sometime!

"Hi, someone I know has a pattern where they vent to people about their problems but feel guilt for it afterwards, along with a few others that I'll describe later on. I will refer to this person as Y. Y is aware of this pattern and how it makes them feel, but I was wondering what are some ways I could help them? Here's more info about what they do & how they (report that) they think: Y compares themself to others. An example of this was when they said they're feeling envious of others because they have better communication skills than Y. Y thought that others were much more knowledgable and had more to offer to conversations, whereas Y feels like they've forgotten a large chunk of their lives that would help them contribute better. Y also have expressed doubt over how 'tangible' or 'shapeless' their sense of self is. They feel like they lack any solid identity but aren't sure whether that's the case. When asked why Y continues to complain when they believe that it pushes people away, Y replied that they don't think they're good at anything else. Y guessed that it could also be because they only want to reveal the bad sides of themself so they won't be caught off-guard if someone rejects them when they're showing the best sides of themself. Y isn't sure how accurate their self-insight is. Y also said that it is pointless to have a friend because 'nobody will accept all of them.' And because there is little reward for being friends with someone. I suspect Y has low empathy, which they agree with. According to Y, they are usually oblivious or indifferent when it comes to how others are feeling. Having higher empathy would make Y feel happiness when others are happy, or pick up on others' emotions, so it would reward Y to have a reciprocal relationship, when now it doesn't. Y doesn't see the point of it, they think a friendship is mainly cost/benefit. Y is usually pessimistic and self-defeating when it comes to connecting with others, but they constantly seek out affirmation and communication online. Y thinks it's likely that any friend would leave them eventually and fears rejection, so they do not attempt to make friends in real life. They also believe that they can communicate their thoughts easier online (for better or for worse). Y said that they're socially awkward and lack what would make them desirable to other people, and even if they were desirable to others, this would be overshadowed by their flaws (but I think that's them exaggerating for justification why they won't make friends, Y doesn't believe they are truly irredeemable.) Y says that they are annoying and a burden on others which they believe becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Their belief might lead to resentment and anxiety. They feel like they constantly have to make up for mistakes, and get into a loop where they complain about this and apologize for burdening the others by complaining and seeking affirmation. They can withdraw thinking it's pointless to communicate because they will enter this loop and ward others away. When Y does this, Y feels worried that they've shown too much of their negative side and that others will leave them because there isn't enough value for them to continue liking Y. Y thinks that they do this even when Y doesn't like the people that Y wants to like Y. Y is often self-centered and often focuses only on pathologizing their problems, ignoring others or any other topic of conversation. This causes them stress, guilt, and anxiety, but they continue to do so. Y badly wants someone to tell them exactly what their issue is, and has admitted to being 'somewhat masochistic' in how they want something to be wrong with them. But when Y gets advice, Y acknowledges it, but I don't think that Y implements it in their life. They say their life feels stagnant, which they believe may be the reason why they keep thinking the same thoughts and cannot come up with much to say. Y says they lost hope or the belief that the world can be a fun place to explore, learn, and grow, or that they will be safe. Y is not very ambitious and doesn't try new things, loses motivation quickly when they fail, is self-deprecating, meek, lacks confidence, is stuck in their head. Y also says they have low self-esteem. What can I do to help? And is there any thought processes or behavior patterns worth noticing?"