My journal is now public property
I apologize if this gets posted twice. . Recently someone from circle invaded my personal space. Found my journal. My therapist suggested to write things down so I have. In my private journal I wrote about unkind behavior toward me. Things that hurt me. Wasn’t mean words just how I felt. All my truths. Words I cried writing down. Felt good to get in on paper. I placed it in a drawer. Now torn apart and posted to social media, texted to friends, family, coworkers, neighbors, and former teachers. I don’t know how people are reacting. I can’t control any narrative here. I’m told “everyone hates me you are a horrible person “ but only told this by the person who ripped it up because they didn’t like reading about my feelings. I’m being gaslighted even tho my truth is real. I get the photos removed from social media . It’s gone I can’t do anything about the texts. The words being spoken too. Somehow I’m the bad guy here. Their words hit me in every direction that they know it hurts. I’m going all grey rock method at this point (it works). Still my privacy Is invaded. I’m feeling like everyone’s looking at me. My heads down. I didn’t do anything wrong. Yet I feel like I’m public enemy number 1. Honestly part of me feels like it probably did more damage to the person that shared this. The words I wrote spoke about controlling behavior and my concern with multiple personality disorders (for him). It’s weird you shared this it’s like your tattlihg on yourself . Everyone must know. Everyone must see it. It’s harder to actually believe it then say it. will anyone ever talk to me again?
@thunderstereo This is such a severe violation of your privacy and trust! Writing things down is a great way to process emotions and get things off your chest and out of your mind . Your feelings and your truth are completely valid and you're absolutely right, you did nothing wrong.
I thought about the journal online honestly posting here it’s made me a bit self aware and maybe a little paranoid
Immediately after this happened, I contacted my therapist for an urgent appointment, and we talked for 46 minutes. She gave me guidance, and I tried to explain that what was shared was from my private journal written only for myself. To me, that’s very different from someone openly discussing me with others.
I’m being asked to make a public apology, but that doesn’t make sense to me. If the journal was private, why would I respond publicly? For now, I’ve deactivated my social media. Not that I post anyway
One journal entry was me processing concerns about whether this person might have multiple personality disorders. I was privately documenting behaviors I noticed. How they treated me and others , along with podcasts, books, and resources my therapist recommended after I asked for help understanding what I was experiencing.
@thunderstereo Make a public apology for what were your private thoughts and feelings? That doesn't make sense to me either.
@thunderstereo
This must be really hard for you and all I want to say as someone who has gone through something similar on a smaller scale is just hold on and stay strong. The first few days, weeks are the hardest, but it eventually settles. And in due time you can even move away from the people you have written about; you can move to new institutions and have a fresh start. This is debilitating for sure, but the hardest part is now. After this, the gossip and anger burn out pretty fast and people forget. And you can actually move away from this people and places. I am so sorry you have to go through this, no one deserves to have their life thrown upside down with such a violation of privacy.