Not feeling well inside. Need some help with this.

I wrote some lines to express what going inside me, which are like this -

Sometimes these feelings are too much with me,

Too much that sometime I barely can breath.

I tried to distract myself and tried to make myself feel good,

I tried to watch some interesting movie and made myself my favourite food.

But all of these things barely helps me calm,

Cause the anxiety and pending works are always here to harm.

I made some plans, to win the battle of life,

But I starts failing as soon as I try.

I just feel this way and I don't know how to tell this, hope someone understands this. I don't know is this because I of addiction which I am trying to cope with and now 1 week clean. Or is this because of new struggles in life. I am trying to change my old habits, old thinking and trying to replace them with new healthy habits and trying to chase my Lil goals and be better person now. But this seems like not going anywhere but a constant loop of trying to be what I can't be. It is feeling so hard and in my mind I am feeling like a crap right now. Old thoughts and scenerios are coming inside head again and again. Feeling lonley and *** again. I didn't even started going to college this semester and feeling like i already need a break which I am on, from 2 days. Something is upsetting inside me. I don't know what to do with these feelings.

It requires a lot of efforts for me to write these feelings :⁠-⁠(

Thanks for reading this.