Past keeps pushing through
I guess I need to vent? Or maybe advice on how to cope?
My partner and I have been together for three years, very hard years. He cheated on me for two of the years and lied and hid it from me. His ex wife did tell me herself and I found proof on his phone. I stayed with him because I love him the kids. Yesterday I had a moment, I broke down because he showed me a picture of him with his kid and I started having anxiety because of the date on the picture and I told him how I felt and that it was the date and he told me I mentally messed up and need help because it's not a big deal and that I'm a manipulator and a emotional abuser because I wanted to talk about my feelings and I was crying and having a hard time getting my words out and he walks towards me and I thought he was going to hug me and give reassurance and he walks past me and starts saying how I'm horribly messed up and what's the point of our relationship and I should get over it, it's not a big deal. I'm a the crazy one? I wasn't trying to hurt him or anything I was just upset and hurt .
@lightBalsam3507
I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this. You deserve patience, love, and understanding. You're not crazy for wanting to talk things through or to talk about your feelings. Relationships can't function without healthy communication, and it sounds like that's all you were asking for. Some semblance of healthy communication with your partner. How he responded was uncalled for and unfair. Being hurt by his actions and wanting a discussion is not emotional manipulation. It doesn't sound like you were trying to hurt him, but it does sound like he doesn't mind hurting you. And you deserve better than that. You deserve a partner who is attentive to your feelings and gives you that reassurance and comfort when you're overwhelmed with feelings. I've been in a relationship like that before, where my feelings were seen as too much, and I really feel for you. I'm wishing you peace and hoping for a resolution.
@SophieSounds Thank you for your encouraging words, I'm sorry you went through it as well.
I’m so very sorry you’re going through this. You’re NOT crazy; you’re just trying to do the very NORMAL thing of sharing and venting your valid feelings to the one who’s supposed to be your soulmate. You are to be commended for your honesty. His response to you is completely unfair. He would really benefit from counseling, provided he is willing to be honest with the therapist. I’m a guy and have been working with a very good therapist for awhile. I’ve definitely benefited.
You may want to consider talking with a counselor, especially if you don’t have a close and vulnerable group of friends. Isolation is a killer. We all need a safe space to share our inner selves, a judgment-free place.
Thanks for sharing your story. I’m praying for you.