Why I have trouble trusting people, and Why I'm single.

This has been a hard thing for me to write.  I have started over 3 times now.

The reason why I'm still single and don't trust people is because when I was in school, I got bullied until graduation.  I was in a Church for 3 years, but the friendships were not deep enough to last after the church fell apart.  Also I didn't click with any of the females there.  Next I was in some other Churches but those people didn't seem to care anything about me going there.  So I didn't click with those people either.  And then I was in 2nd shift Custodian job and it isolated me.  Some of the people there was kinda nice to me but nothing deep enough to continue past when the job ended. Another thing about those people was that I never felt that I could totally count them as friends cause some of them turned on me.  Sometimes I even felt that some lead me on, making me think they were when they weren't really.  For example one person I thought I was in good with, came back for a visit.  But they never reached out to me.  I decided to say something and they replied that we are friends because I didn't text message with them.  Right, I never text message with anyone.  Basically I couldn't trust those people.  Then there were the people on the internet.  They often times would either ghost me or get upset with me.  I couldn't tell you how many times I had to start all over.  These days it feels like pulling teeth to get anyone to click with me.  I'm probably not doing something right.  But I could could blame my brain for it.  Like I have difficultly getting into other people's posts.  If they make me think too hard, then I have trouble.  I've always done better in one on one conversations than I do in public conversations.  That includes both online and offline.  I don't know why, but it does effect things.