deaming with depression and feeling like the worst is always going to happen
hi, i dont really know which category to put this to so im putting it in general.
ive been feeling really lost for a long time now, all my relationships have failed because i always want more than the other person, which is, an actual relationship. this really makes me feel awful because i feel like to others im only seen as someone the can have a casual thing with despite the fact that its not my thing.
all my emotions are so imbalanced right now due to this and i really dont know how to work with all this. i do have medication for depression and anxiety but itll take me a while to get the recipe again.
i really struggle sometimes with opening up to new people and letting them see me as i really am because i am a really intense person and i always fear that once they find out im kinda weird theyll leave, and the fact that its happened so often with relationships is really not helping.
i am so so tired of these fears and feeling like im always either way too much or never enough, i really want to become balanced with myself again but i really dont know where to start.
@unangepasse Hi there
It does hurt when our seriousness is met with causal ignorance<3 Relationships are complicated like that. Many of us learn the value of us after going through the worst of it all. Coming back from a setback or fall takes time, healing takes time. The wait is the worst part, it is where we suffer the most but it is also where we learn the most.
You're aware of what you want to change, that's a good start. The majority of time we spend on our healing journey usually goes towards finding out the kind of help we need, where to look, when to ask and then in sorting out what actually works for us. So you're making progress, you're asking the questions which will lead you to go out and look for the answers<3
You're trying your best and you are enough :)
@unangepasse
Hi, I'm so sorry you feel so boxed in. I know how horribe that feels.
Please give yourself some grace, to know, there are ways to get past this stage of things.
You coming here and sharing your feelings is a wonderful start and you should be very proud of yourself.
Having an intense personality is really good from the the persective of being independent and really forward thinking ahead of most people. BUT the downside is the uncertainty to just fit in with the lesser or frivioulus expectations of certain groups or people .
Maybe start by knowing you are, All of That and believe in yourself, with no questions..... then figure out the next step.
You can break the cycle, i'm sure of it. keep sharing and trying, you can do it.
@unangepasse It does seem suspiciously like nobody really wants anything anymore. Can't wrap my head around that. Sorry you feel rejected.
