how do i get over my first, awful date!
a few monhs ago, i got out of a long term relationship (3 years) and i recently have started getting back out into the dating scene. first ever date went amazing and the guy was so sweet UNTIL i trauma dumped and he left the date early and ghosted me. i asked him if he wanted things to just stay friendly and he said yes. i totally get it, and it was a bad move from me! but i cant stop feeling so embarrassed about that and he was kind of totally amazing. ive had great dates since (one that lasted 9 hours and was full of amazing conversation!!) but i cannot stop thinking about this date and feeling so much shame.
how do i get over this??
@compassionateSquare7403
well that was unfortunate but what done is done.......
I have many times i would like a do-over in life wish i had not said or did something but all my stress or worry about it is just in a way Self harm ...... beating myself up for something that honestly... whomever i said something to have long since forgot the whole thing.
I’m so sorry to hear what happened to you.It must be heartbreaking feeling this way.I believe the first way to get over what happened is to accept it happened.Don’t make yourself feel bad for what happened in the past.The past can’t be changed.
I’m not sure what you trauma dumped him for however I believe you are better off without him since he doesn’t believe your past aligns with his ideal relationship.
😭😭 thank you so much this really helps, i just feel awful for putting that poor guy through that lmao
@compassionateSquare7403 my opinion is that they aren't a very forgiving person if they left the date early and ghosted you, and maybe they aren't as great as you remember them. Even if you did trauma dump, you're not the first person to do that, you're human, be kind to yourself. I understand you feel shame, maybe it is your subconscious wanting some kind of closure and therefore telling you that you missed out on something good. I don't think you did. I think you'll find someone who is a better fit for you. I hope that helps a bit. And PS. I've done exactly the same thing, trauma dumping, you're not alone 🤗
