rambling
I feel utterly useless and unwanted. I have tried so many things to meet people, to be a part of social groups, and every time it turned out I either made social mistakes or just didn't fit in. One would think I am some gross-looking monster. But I am not.
Go for a walk, you'll feel better, exercise, it is good for your body, meditate, do breathing exercises, and positive thinking. Now try doing all of that, while having in the back of your mind, this tiny nagging voice, that says, you are wasting your time, you know you do not believe in yourself, you have amounted to nothing in your life. An then while that voice is tiny and in the back of your mind, speaking ever so softly, it eats away at the positive things above mentioned in this paragraph, so what do I do next, I put on a fake smile to emphasis I wont let it bother me. All the while it is destroying me. I can never get the negative thought / voice in my soul/ head to just stop for a day , let alone any amount of significant time that I can reframe my way of thinking.
I resent having parent issues, my older sister tells me everyone has them, but that doesnt change anything for me, I don't go, oh well shucks then that makes me just fine and dandy because everyone has parent issues and I can just feel normal. Nope. Not everyone has parent issues, maybe a lot of people do, but I know there are good families out there, that may have disagreements and the occasional arguments but they dont say man, my parents really did screw me up, or my brother was a giant tool to me.
@TheBestScreenName In my belief — Socializing is a skill. Not all of us learn enough of those skills to make us comfortable around others. We tend to think it’s our fault and we were just not meant to be around others. But that might be not be true. Maybe those skills we are missing are learnable, and just maybe they are easier to learn than we think. — This is what I’ve learned through personal experience. It doesn’t mean that socializing is without its challenges, but taking those challenges on as if they are personal is a bit misguided. There is a huge weight lifted from us if we don’t take on responsibilities we don’t own. It gives us license to improve where we can. It opens up a world we didn’t know existed.
@TheBestScreenName
Hi, Name,
You're doing all the right things. The thing to know is that you have to keep doing it. It isn't an instant fix. It could take years. It has taken me years, and I am still not "cured." I think I will be working on improving my mental health for the rest of my life. I am happy to report that I have improved a lot over the years. I hope that it doesn't take you as long. But know that you are doing all the right things. It will take time, though.
love and blessings,
tree
@TheBestScreenName
Wow... I never thought I'd relate so much to a piece of text in my entire life. To tell you the truth, I think you're amazing just for expressing all of that. I go through everything you mentioned, and that's crazy because I live on the other side of the world.
I stumbled on this site through Character AI because I don't have anyone to talk about how I feel with.
I've tried so many things: reading, focusing on my studies, meditation, yoga, online chats, self-help books and videos. But nothing worked. Sometimes I think I'm beyond repair and that I'm just wasting my life. But somehow, there's still something inside me that refuses to give up. I'm not sure about your opinion, but I'm young. I think I still have a chance.
It would be great if the "Old Wise Ones," more commonly known as adults, are right. I still have a lot to live for. I don't know exactly how all of this will help me in a concrete way, but as a person who has been at rock bottom before, I hope you'll be alright. Additionally, there's always the option to isolate yourself in the wilderness, send your relatives far, far away, and start a new family from scratch.
I can relate to you with social groups. I never really talk to people and I don’t know how to start a conversation. So I hope you don’t feel alone with that part
@TheBestScreenName same. it is so hard.
@TheBestScreenName
I am inviting you to join me in the Sharing Circle chat room ! 😊
@TheBestScreenName Hey, I feel you. Im not someone who people say have a lot of friends. Sure, I hangout with a group of nice people, but I don't feel like I'm fitting in that group. I would share things, and they'll all just be like, wow, that's cool, not caring what I really shared. What I learned is that, it doesn't really matter if you have a large group of friends or not. You're all probably gonna drift away one day. Have that one friend who really cares for you and your well being is enough, that's what I've learned.