Blurp

You know that feeling of being so confused and unwilling to either take a left turn or a right turn so you just sit at the middle? That's me right now. I hate the fact that i have to be dependent on anyone for emotional support. I hate that i am not strong enough and cannot exist on my own. Its why i keep enduring different maltratments and emotional toture. One part of me is saying "walk out of this" and another part is asking "how are you going to cope if you walk out of this?" The latter appears to be scarier for me right now. I don't know how i would be able to exist on my own if i walked out of this. 

Somewhere in my head, i feel like i am overthinking it and maybe the situation is not as bad as i think it is. I mean i have been taken care of and not everyday is a bad day. But i have this crazy feeling in my gut that this is not okay but i am also worried that i am also being dramatic.