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AGirlWithAWeirdName
1 1,224 M Little Steps 3
PathStep 14 Compassion hearts127 Forum posts31 Forum upvotes79 Current upvotes79 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2026 Member sinceMay 11, 2023
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How Do You Make Someone Feel Like a Burden Without Saying It?
General Support / by AGirlWithAWeirdName
Last post
 August 18th
...See more Why do some people seem to enjoy making other people feel pathetic? I reach out because we are friends, yet the effort almost always seems to come from one side. And even when the other person does reach out, it feels rushed. When I try to get off the call because I don't want to feel like I'm imposing, I'm asked to stay and reassured that I'm not a bother. Yet somehow, I still leave the interaction wondering where I actually stand. There are promises that don't get kept, and the worst part is finding myself holding on to those promises like a thread, only to watch them fall apart every single time. It's exhausting. It's honestly disgusting. For fear of seeming "too much," I hold myself back from reaching out. And when I finally do, I get the same tired apology and the same old explanation "I've been busy." As though I've had all the free time in the world to keep reaching out. Silly goose. Then there's the other situation, someone who is supposedly a romantic partner. Apparently, my style is too uptight. Apparently, I should loosen things up. So I actually listen. I try to switch things up. I go shopping for clothes that are less "uptight" and more corporate-casual because, well, I work in a corporate environment, just without a strict dress code. Then, on a video call, the first comment is, "What's all this on your neck?",  delivered in that unmistakably sarcastic, mocking tone. It was a freaking three-layer necklace. And I swear, my heart just sank. For a moment, I felt ridiculous for trying. I felt stupid for taking the criticism seriously. I felt my confidence drop because somehow, even after trying to accommodate what had been asked of me, there was still something to mock. Whatever. Silly humans, really.
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Everyday is a battle
Depression Support / by AGirlWithAWeirdName
Last post
 August 8th
...See more Nobody talks about how difficult it is to have a pretty demanding job with one million KPIs while fighting depression and trying to be productive each day. The struggle is so real, almost suffocating even. No one gets it but you, no one sees your struggles but you. Truth is, I am not interested in my struggle been seen because those who caught a glimpse of it never understood it... they chalked it up to just being sad. Dance it off, they said... don't let the devil steal your joy, they advised... make friends, they suggested.... do things that makes you happy, they chirped. What they didn't realise is all of these takes a certain level of energy to engage in that just isn't present. Half of the time, i am fighting to get off my bed, and if i manage to take a shower or even walk to the door, its a good day. Every day we make the decision to stay alive, to keep fighting, to not give up. Being a part of each day is deciding not to let go and it takes a whole lot of courage to do so.  Cheers to each and everyone of us fighting battles that no one understands. Cheers to us all who chose to fight to be here today. 
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Maybe its too soon?
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by AGirlWithAWeirdName
Last post
 August 6th
...See more I have been smoking for a while now. Not at a stretch though, just when life starts life-ing and i cannot cope on my own. Pills used to be my thing as well as alcohol but i decided to quit. I was sober for a while but i fell off the wagon again. Feels like i traded one addiction for the other. I really want to stop....I really do I want to throw this pack of cigarette i have stashed in my cupboard away but i am so scared. I am scared that this act of courage - throwing away the cigarette, would be shortlived. I worry that by the time life starts life-ing again, i am going to back at this point. 
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Blurp
General Support / by AGirlWithAWeirdName
Last post
 August 4th
...See more You know that feeling of being so confused and unwilling to either take a left turn or a right turn so you just sit at the middle? That's me right now. I hate the fact that i have to be dependent on anyone for emotional support. I hate that i am not strong enough and cannot exist on my own. Its why i keep enduring different maltratments and emotional toture. One part of me is saying "walk out of this" and another part is asking "how are you going to cope if you walk out of this?" The latter appears to be scarier for me right now. I don't know how i would be able to exist on my own if i walked out of this.  Somewhere in my head, i feel like i am overthinking it and maybe the situation is not as bad as i think it is. I mean i have been taken care of and not everyday is a bad day. But i have this crazy feeling in my gut that this is not okay but i am also worried that i am also being dramatic.
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Blurp
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by AGirlWithAWeirdName
Last post
 August 5th
...See more  Special offer! Save $25 on therapy with code 25OFF7C AGirlWithAWeirdName  1  1,174 M Little Steps 3 PathStep 14  Compassion hearts106  Forum posts23  Forum upvotes58  Current upvotes58  Age GroupAdult  Last activeAugust, 2026  Member sinceMay 11, 2023 Public Private Journal What's on your mind You know that feeling of being so confused and unwilling to either take a left turn or a right turn so you just sit at the middle? That's me right now. I hate the fact that i have to be dependent on anyone for emotional support. I hate that i am not strong enough and cannot exist on my own. Its why i keep enduring different maltratments and emotional toture. One part of me is saying "walk out of this" and another part is asking "how are you going to cope if you walk out of this?" The latter appears to be scarier for me right now. I don't know how i would be able to exist on my own if i walk out of this.  Somewhere in my head, i feel like i am overthinking it and maybe the situation is not as bad as i think it is. I mean i have been taken care of and not everyday is a bad day. But i have this crazy feeling in my gut that this is not okay but i am also worried that i am also being dramatic.
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Its keeps getting harder
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by AGirlWithAWeirdName
Last post
 September 23rd, 2024
...See more I've worked so hard to get clean and stay clean. Life, however, keeps making this sobriety journey so hard. Even as I write right now, the urge the drink is so strong. Its like I can't just get a break and everything that has been happening to me is just directing me towards a bottle. I don't know how long I can hold on. Fighting this battle is hard, fighting is alone is harder!!
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It's probably bad
Addiction Support / by AGirlWithAWeirdName
Last post
 November 11th, 2023
...See more I was sober for 7 months but now I feel like my sobriety has gone down the drain. Couple of days back I got into this intense arguments or conversation with my partner about me not wanting to carry out the conventional duties of a woman. To be very honest, I have no issues with doing most of the things expected but in my part of the world, I have seen how women get treated once the subject themselves to the Almighty conventional duties of a woman. I have made several compromises for him and even attempted to adjust my personality just so we don't have issues but it feels like whatever i do is never enough because there's always one thing to complain about or the other. The fact that he has now made this his way or the highway kind of conversation is really triggering for me. I mean, he has been the only stable thing in my life for over 9 months and to lose that, I'm not sure I'm ready for that. The past 2-3 months have been so exhausting and his incessant desire to always talk about everything drives me nuts. Frankly, I don't like talking about our fights, I prefer to just apologize and move on. I mean, what's the point of talking about it if at the end of the day you're still going to make me out to be the one at fault. Isn't it just better to apologize and just move on. But because he prefers to talk about everything, he makes us do it even when I don't want to. I've told him over and again that I do not like talking about our issues but I don't think he cares about that, I always have to do what he wants. I guess I got so exhausted, mentally stressed and emotionally distraught and I just wanted to feel calm because it felt like I had a lot of loads on my shoulders and like the world was spinning so fast, I ended up smoking. Although it was just one time but I think we know better than to assume it will just be one time. I relapsed and I feel so guilty about it.
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The Future
Anxiety Support / by AGirlWithAWeirdName
Last post
 August 27th, 2023
...See more Lately, I find myself worried and scared. I am at this stage of my life where I constantly question what would be my next move after bagging all these degrees. Everyone has high expectations of me and I feel this heavy weight on my shoulders. I don't know which is heavier - the fact that people have high expectations of me or the fact that some are waiting for me to mess up but I can't give them that satisfaction. To be honest, I don't know what to do after this. I've hidden under the umbrella of education for too long, and it's almost time up. I don't know, maybe I am just being dramatic...
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