I feel like I'm at the end of my rope and it's fraying
This is the first time I've ever posted my own thread in a 7 Cups community forum. I hope I'm doing it right.
I'm really struggling this week. I've had to expend so much effort managing my emotions and I'm exhausted and I just don't have the energy to do it right now. I just got off the phone with my eye doctor's office. They called to cancel and told me they were rescheduling for a time a few weeks from now and it's not the end of the world, but because I'm at the end of all my coping strategies, it feels that way. If someone needs to call to reschedule an appointment, they should ask what times might work for you and be apologetic, not just inform you that they won't be keeping the appointment you made 8 months ago and rearranged your life to get to, with a totally unsympathetic receptionist who says that it doesn't matter if you didn't get the appointment reminder card and no, they don't get people in earlier due to cancellations because they use the cancellations for emergencies so you can take it or leave it while you ration your contact lenses.
In this case, my eye doctor had a death in her family, and that's understandable. But she also canceled/rescheduled in 2023 at the last minute because my appointment was on Halloween and she decided to take her kids trick-or-treating. So I'm not feeling very good about my eye doctor but also I have a hard time dealing with new things and I'm at the end of my rope so I booked the appointment for now, even though I don't know if I can keep it.
Another doctor of mine broke his leg and texted me a mere hour before (when I should have been heading toward his office) to say he was practicing telemedicine for a while (he's known this for weeks so not letting me know earlier seems weird), and I had an appointment with him last night that was awful; I won't go into the details of that but suffice it to say I'm not coping with sudden changes well.
These are little things among the big things I won't detail. These are not the things that have me unable to function and sobbing in my kitchen. I don't know how to feel better anymore. I wish I did. I really want to feel better.
@convivialStrawberries8026
There are limits to resilience. I'm sorry you're going through this. When you already have problems attacking you (these big things you didn't go into detail about), the smaller things that shouldn't matter too much instead become vicious embers to fuel the fire. I'm currently not doing well myself lol so I don't know how much advice I can give, but I'm glad you at least still love yourself through it all to still want to feel better.
@determinedSea4370 Thanks for your comment. It's good to hear others have similar feelings. I hope we all feel better!
@convivialStrawberries8026 aww bless you, I'm so sorry your struggling so bad🙁 theese little things are always just the last straw, I understand that. My psychiatrist made an appointment with me for this march, and I had a cancellation letter yesterday,and will hear about another appointment soon🙁 I know it's not exactly short notice like yours, but you work yourself up so much to be able to go to /deal with theese things to be let down🙁 it's horrible🙁 gives you a giant tiny hug ❤ you did really well opening up here ❤ sending love your way ❤
@Tinywhisper11 Thanks for answering. I'm taking care of myself and I do feel a bit better today. I'm very tired of having to expend so much energy on these things, but I guess that's what I have to do, because not doing it makes things so much worse.
I hope you have a good appointment with your psychiatrist, whenever it comes.
@convivialStrawberries8026 ❤❤❤
Please know that I have experienced the same rudeness and it triggers the tears of a life filled with loss. My sobbing and crying might be a release of years of crap I have put up with. It also might be my safe place I retreat to even though it hurts.
I understand wanting to feel better…
@rationalZebra9355 Something about the disregard of other people is so painful, isn't it? Thanks for being here.
I know it must be feeling hard right now, you must be questioning as to why everything is only going down the slope, n nothing is in your favour.
Keep with it just for a few moments my friend, i promise you will cope with everything before you know it. And you will look back at this time, n be proud of yourself for making things work when they were at their worst.
There r better n brighter time ahead very soon.
Whenever you feel like running away from everything, just remind yourself, you r a fighter. You have dealt with a lot many problems before, n you will do it this time also.
It's okay to not be okay.
@LadyViolet00 Yes, I fight--I'm just tired and overwhelmed. I need to retreat sometimes.
I can imagine what you have to go through. Its well. You'll be alright, just before you know it. You should always remember that this too shall pass and you'll pull through, just hang on there. My cousin said that if you're going through ***, well, go on, because, you're not going into it, but, through it. Just remember you're a tough one and it's because, you can handle situations like this and win that they can come to you. You'll be alright
@Goodness001 I'm working on it! Thanks for your encouragement.
@convivialStrawberries8026 Hello firstly 😊 I get what you mean. When we have been through alot, and our emotions are heightened, for a long time, we tell ourselves it is ok and bottle it up and keep going and then one day the smallest thing breaks us, it's not a big event, but it represents the tipping point and it all comes flooding out, it can be therapeutic but exhausting and hard to navigate also. I'm glad you could reach out, because sometimes vocalising our feelings, takes the sting and power out of them. Prioritising our mental wellbeing is vital 😊 take care and keep on talking and being you 😊🥰
@Amanda84 Thanks. I don't even know that I bottle it up. I just think there's too much and not enough safe ways to approach it. I'm trying. It's still very hard, but I am trying.
@convivialStrawberries8026 I take into consideration the fact that there are not enough safe ways to process/talk about it. I'm glad you are trying and I'm rooting for your success 😊♥️
