Oh where Oh where Is my Motivation??????

I always keep a table reserved for motivation when Im trying to get better, trying to work or trying to do pretty much anything. Hes supposed to be here at my command, but the idiot is always late.While waiting for the no-show, I get distracted by daydreaming, dog walking, snacking, emailing, mulling things over, sky watching, desk cleaning, web surfing and a dozen other things that suddenly demand attention. I wind up feeling scattered, frustrated and depressed – all because of the missing motivation.

All too often, thats the way my day goes. I dont feel right and cant finish anything. Yesterday, though, I listened to an interview with Julie Fast about how she gets through a day of depression. She has a way of waking me up with a few gallons of cold water over my head. lol

Motivation is a myth, she claims. And that clicks. When youre depressed, she explains, youre never going to feel motivated. Depression keeps inventing reasons why you cant do anything, why you should give in to the need to be alone and shut everyone out. If you wait until you feel motivated to do something, you wont get it done. very true-

I get that. A day of depression is a shapeless mass you never get hold of. No goal is worthwhile, planning is pointless and often a catatonic, trance-like state seems so attractive. Thats where depression takes me while Im waiting for the right feeling and motivation to arrive.

"OH WHERE-OH WHERE IS MY SHINY MOTIVATION AT"

Whether reading Julie Fasts bookGet It Done While Depressed, or listening to her talk, Im always struck by the energy and action she embodies. How can she be depressed when shes constantly talking about doing, structuring, getting out of the house, making the most of every hour, acting as your own drill sergeant to keep you going? Who can do all that when really depressed?

Yet in listening more closely to what she says and how she says it, I can also hear an edge of almost desperate determination. She has to try to speed things up, force herself into action, do things she doesnt in the least want to do because shes fighting depression 24 hours a day. If she lets her guard down, she knows shell be overwhelmed and just stop. As she says, what are the choices? Hospital, suicide or forcing herself to refuse to give in. So with every bit of energy and determination she can muster, she tries to fight back. Its hard, endless and often frustrating.

Its about knowing your limits and not trying to take on the world all at once. Doing whatever you can do, no matter how bad you feel, is the basic idea. Taking one small step – like getting out of bed – can be a huge accomplishment because taking that one step can lead to another, then another. What she finds is that by playing the role of a well person, she starts to feel better and think more positively.Not everyone will find her strategies a good fit, but following through on any action-oriented strategy that works for you is the basis of her approach. And shes not alone in emphasizing action over purely cognitive strategies.

"I see my motivation coming"...........