Relationally underdeveloped people: unfixable?

Every once in a while I try to go on the pointless quest of trying to find help for my issues. This time I typed into google "I cant have a relationship because im underdeveloped" and all I get is stuff like "is your partner a manchild??" and basically everything that frames us relationally unintelligent folk as some sort of evil entity that needs to be fled from and never actually helped. What's up with that, is it just assumed that we're hopeless? That we're unfixable? Like I don't even know what to call my issue(s). I just have a vague, hard-to-put-to-words idea of what they are and where they came from. But it's not really something I can get tested/diagnosed/treated for...

Am I just doomed to be stuck like this? I already lost someone, really the last person I was close to, because of this. Idk.

Oh and don't even get me started on listeners. There's no category to choose from for anything even remotely close and general requests get you nowhere. That and I have trouble putting this stuff to words, especially when I'm in the spotlight.