How do you overcome setbacks?
Ever planned something so carefully and put your heart into it, but it didn't go your way?
How did you push through such a setback and come out stronger? What did it feel like when you were going through it all and how does that compare to now? Share your experience I'm eager to know!
@bunniewerm hi there :) I think I qualify to answer this xD
I recently faced a setback that left me questioning not only my hard work but also my worth as a person. The fall from the high of working on something you are so confident and hopeful about is truly heart shattering.
The days after the fall are the most difficult to handle cause all you want to do is forget about it while constantly needing to think or talk about it. The talking part does helps a bit but there's nothing else to do other than to just let yourself feel the emotions. Fighting it isn't helpful at all, so the old method of 'acknowledge and release' is the way to go :)
It does get better with time and it's important to keep in mind all the things that went right while we're struggling with the noise of all that we did wrong. Working on what to do next is helpful as well even if you're moving forward with the tiniest of steps.
Also also crying helps a lot so cry first, handle it later *-*
@BlueDarkAurora Hii! Omg, you've described it perfectly! I definitely relate to this. Thank you for taking the time to share your experience, and I'm glad you made your way through it 🥹💞
@bunniewerm :) <3
@bunniewerm It’s such a raw feeling, isn’t it? Putting your heart into something and seeing it fall short.
But I’ve realized those setbacks are often where we find our true strength. i believe it’s about learning to embrace the disappointment, pick yourself up and adjust your course.
@Phoenixthepoised It sure is! You're absolutely right, it's definitely how we struggle and recover from setbacks that shapes us into who we are. ✨️
@bunniewerm I agree wholeheartedly with that statement, it's in the hardest of times, we find our biggest strengths and our best sense of character 😊
@Amanda84 No doubt in that, Amanda! 💖✨️
A setback is an occurance that I have been exposed to on plenty of occasions.
There are approaches that I've relied on and refined.
They all draw from the fact that everything that happens to us cannot be controlled , how we react is in our control.
The mindset that success is external only is a limited one . It is internally that true success begins and the mental models we create have a big part to play in them.
I tend to think in the third person usually asking myself why this is happening, why do I think this certain way , why does it hurt etc.
I meditate frequently and have a host of other rituals I rely on to prime my mind.
How did it feel like while it was going on?
Honestly? It felt like crap , every other day you feel like extra baggage , you dont want to face anything or anyone.
How does it feel now?
I dont take stuff to heart as often as I think on it objectively, I dont let the external world control my mental space and that is what I would urge everyone to experiment with as well.
Be true to yourself, experience each moment unfiltered with emotion , observe but dont get swayed. master your self.
Best wishes,
Fern 🌿
✨
@thoughtfulFern53 Wow, it is truly incredible the way that you have learnt from setbacks, developed mental models like analysing the situation from another's perspective, and practice healthy habits like meditation, making you much stronger now. I loved your advice to observe but not get swayed. There's truly a lot to learn from your experiences, Fern. Thanks a lot for sharing!
I could have my whole life planned out, but the pandemic came out of nowhere. I knew my loved one was sick and dying, locked himself in the room. I couldn’t tell anyone because only I knew that I was losing him. Those days, I couldn’t breathe. I would scream at the top of my lungs outside. The love of my life was dying & I was not allowed to go near him. No one prepares you for things like this. I just followed my heart. And held onto dear life.
@luminoustherapyspace I am so sorry for your loss. It breaks me that you had to go through so much all on your own. COVID was an incredibly devastating time, and isolation made everything so much harder than it already was. Thank you so much for sharing your story, it takes a lot of courage to open up and I appreciate you for it. You are incredibly strong for surviving that pain, for holding on, and for following your heart even when everything felt impossible. I hope you're finding healing, even in small ways. I pray you never have to face anything alone ever again. You deserve that and so much more. 🥺🫀
I planned my retirement to Kentucky, to buy a house and live happily ever after near my grandchildren and son. Then my wife abandoned me and I found out we were absolutely broke and bankrupt. I’m still searching through the rubble. So, I like your question.
@lostman2608 Hey, I'm really sorry for what happened 💔.
The fact that you are still here says a lot about your strength ✨️.
The best view comes after the hardest climb, just you wait and see! 🌄
Sending loads of prayers your way ☀️.
I planned my retirement to Kentucky, to buy a house and live happily ever after near my grandchildren and son. Then my wife abandoned me and I found out we were absolutely broke and bankrupt. I’m still searching through the rubble. So, I like your question.
@lostman2608 sorry to hear that, I hope that you can make another plan and be happy 🥰
In my case, I'm learning to accept the my feelings towards what went wrong and think how I can improve and create new opportunities ahead. Taking small steps and not overwhelming myself with high expectations. Taking time to slow down and stop whenever is necessary, but never giving up.
@faithfulBunny4716 That's a great strategy, you are doing so well 👏 More power to you!
@bunniewerm
The Setback
Yes. Most definitely. I always thought I was going to be a professional boxer, I trained, I devoted myself for so long on this dream. This aspiration. It was my sole focus in life, and in my mind that nothing was going to stop me from the discipline and training. Began in 2014, And it wasn't until 2024 did I officially learn to let the "idea" go.
The Setup
There is a beautiful video I'll post with this, that relates a little with what I'm talking about.
All the planning, the devotion and the discipline that I put into this dream, Is what turned out to be more important.... THOUSAND times more important than the dream of actually being a professional boxer.
The Lesson
I spent too long holding onto the idea that I was supposed to become an athlete, that I was supposed to fulfill this dream. So much so, It became a crutch. A limitation within myself, within my mind. And it became toxic.
The hardest part was learning to let this go, because what was meant to only last a season, I was holding onto for much longer than what it was meant to be.
I love the devotion, the passion, the preparation. I crave it at times, though I know myself better now than to limit (Hold myself back) again.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMkHFiquDA4
@LearningPeace Wow, thank you so much for sharing!
In chasing our dreams, we often forget to focus on the journey, and how the journey impacts us!
This makes me reflect upon myself and how I have certain ideologies for my future that don't entirely take into account the affect the journey may have on me!
Definitely something I'll be thinking about more now, in multiple aspects of my life, thanks again!
@bunniewerm crap keeps happening in my life, but they're not killing my hope. things will get better and things wil be fixed. therapy will help me. restrictions (because of mental health stuff and other things) will be lifted. ill finally get a job interview and then a job. and other stuff too.
@bunniewerm I planned to be "in it for the long haul"... right as I was making it to what was supposed to be the better part of the journey.. all *** broke loose. I am now in a worse situation than I have ever been for my life. I don't know how to put the pieces back together. Praying for peace forgiveness and even magic seems to be helping at times, and at other times it isn't.
I wish people could have been in my shoes for the last 2 years so they could see what was going on. It seems like there is no hope. In spite of that, I am still praying for hope. Hoping for peace and a middle path forward for everyone. Sometimes life is too much and we just yell the most horrible things we can.
